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Write a paragraph describing a recent vacation that you took with my best friend. Be sure to describe the paragraph in detail, and conclude with what you loved most about your trip.

Write a paragraph describing a recent vacation that you took with my best friend. Be sure to describe the paragraph in detail, and conclude with what you loved most about your trip. O6pjk
After finishing high school, I had a plan for a trip with my best friend and the destination was Suoi Tien amusement park. Since my home is far away, I can only visit this place for a short time and play some games. First, I played adventure games with my friends like speedboats and flying boats all morning, but I have a warning that these games are not for the faint of heart. Next, it was also noon, so I had lunch with my friends and the food my mother prepared for us because the food in Fairy Stream was very expensive. Finally, we watched the colorful 4-season festival show, dolphins. . . and the thing that impressed me was that the fruits like mango, grapefruit. . they made a very large model and it is nearly 3 meters high, after watching it, I also went home because it was already evening. After that trip, I felt that day was great and my favorite thing was watching the colorful 4-season festival show of the fruits of my hometown and I hope I can go to the entertainment area again. .
After finishing high school, I had a plan for a trip with my best friend and the destination was
Possible spelling mistake found.
Suoi
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tien
amusement park. Since my home is far away, I can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
visit this place for a short time and play
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
games.
First
, I played adventure games with my friends like speedboats and flying boats all morning,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I have a warning that these games are not for the faint of heart.
Next
, it was
also
noon,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I had lunch with my friends and the food my mother prepared for us
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the food in Fairy Stream was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
expensive.
Finally
, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watched
the colorful 4-season festival
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
, dolphins.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
and
the thing that impressed me was that the fruits like mango, grapefruit.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
they
made a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
large model and it is
nearly
3 meters high, after watching it, I
also
went home
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it was already evening. After that trip, I felt that day was great and my favorite thing was watching the colorful 4-season festival
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
of the fruits of my hometown and I hope I can go to the entertainment area again.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
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IELTS essay Write a paragraph describing a recent vacation that you took with my best friend. Be sure to describe the paragraph in detail, and conclude with what you loved most about your trip.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
190 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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