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Write a letter to the council for the dirty street: Explain why it has become dirty recentlyWhat problem it has causedGiving some suggestions. v.1

Write a letter to the council for the dirty street: Explain why it has become dirty recentlyWhat problem it has causedGiving some suggestions. v. 1
In the recent times, the higher education, culture has changed dramatically. There is an exorbitant growth of the undergraduate students in the part-time employments. I believe that it is a positive scenario at some extent, although little detrimental effect might occur in the academic performances of the pupils. To begin with, the bright side of the above notion, the inclusion of a tertiary earning with the study at the university would reduce the financial burden on the scholar as well as inculcate the practical skills. Momentarily, the cost of the education has been escalated to a great extent. Hence, many youngsters from the poor family background could not afford it. The availability of the part- time jobs provide the fiscal support of these pupils and motivate them towards their career goals. Moreover, the experience of the job during their young age will be helpful to enhance their practical skills, which could not be taught at the educational institutes. For instance, the communication, money management and time management are the essential for the graduates to build a prosperous career. Thus, the job experience integrated with study will reveal the fruitful results in the future for the students. On the flip side, there is a possibility of the detrimental effect on the academic performance of the pupils such as, scarcity of time for study and exploitation of the teenager. Some undergraduates are more involved with their jobs and devote the ample time to it. As a result, their primary work at the university will suffer. Furthermore, the pupils with less experience of the workplace might be the victim of social and economic exploitation. For example, the survey conducted by WHO revealed that the 50% students in the workplace have to suffer from exploitation. Such incident would sabotage their enthusiasm of study. Thus, the effect of part-time works has a negative side too. In conclusion, at the verge of this competitive environment, the candidates should acquire not only the academic qualification, but also the practical skills for their dynamic career. The experience of the part-time job will provide such opportunity to them, if the students grab the opportunity wisely. Therefore, it is a good practice to work, while studying in the university.
In the recent
times
, the higher education, culture has
changed
dramatically
. There is an exorbitant growth of the undergraduate students in the part-time employments. I believe that it is a
positive
scenario at
some
extent, although
little
detrimental effect might occur in the academic performances of the pupils.

To
begin
with, the bright side of the above notion, the inclusion of a tertiary earning with the
study
at the university would
reduce
the financial burden on the scholar
as well
as inculcate the practical
skills
.
Momentarily
, the cost of the education has
been escalated
to a great extent.
Hence
,
many
youngsters from the poor family background could not afford it. The availability of the part-
time
jobs
provide the fiscal support of these pupils and motivate them towards their career goals.
Moreover
, the
experience
of the
job
during their young age will be helpful to enhance their practical
skills
, which could not
be taught
at the educational institutes.
For instance
, the communication, money management and
time
management are the essential for the graduates to build a prosperous career.
Thus
, the
job
experience
integrated with
study
will reveal the fruitful results in the future for the students.

On the flip side, there is a possibility of the detrimental effect on the academic performance of the pupils such as, scarcity of
time
for
study
and exploitation of the
teenager
.
Some
undergraduates are more involved with their
jobs
and devote the ample
time
to it.
As a result
, their primary work at the university will suffer.
Furthermore
, the pupils with less
experience
of the workplace might be the victim of social and economic exploitation.
For example
, the survey conducted by WHO revealed that the 50% students in the workplace
have to
suffer from exploitation. Such incident would sabotage their enthusiasm of
study
.
Thus
, the effect of part-time works has a
negative
side too.

In conclusion
, at the verge of this competitive environment, the candidates should acquire not
only
the academic qualification,
but
also
the practical
skills
for their dynamic career. The
experience
of the part-time
job
will provide such opportunity to them, if the students grab the opportunity
wisely
.
Therefore
, it is a
good
practice to work, while studying in the university.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Write a letter to the council for the dirty street: Explain why it has become dirty recentlyWhat problem it has causedGiving some suggestions. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
369 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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