Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Would you prefer to live in a traditional house or in a modern apartmentbuilding? Use specific reasons and details to support your choice. v.2

Would you prefer to live in a traditional house or in a modern apartmentbuilding? Use specific reasons and details to support your choice. v. 2
In today' s hectic life people are not concurred upon their preference regarding ' ' living in traditional houses or model buildings' ' . People will provide different opinions about this topic and I consider that these concepts rely on people' s culture, social status, and even family background. As far as I' m concern, a traditional house is much better than a modern apartment, I based my view on the next arguments. To begin with, in a traditional house one have more freedom than a modern apartment. An apartment complex is a place where many people lives. This place is really secured because it has 24 hours surveillance and guardians, nevertheless people have to share the same entrance and installations, and even they cannot change anything that is outside of their apartments. To reflect this argument; let' s refer to my sister Wendys who has lived in a beautiful building for one year. At the beginning she was happy because there was enough space and peace for her children, notwithstanding the history took another course when she wanted to make a renovation in her parking space. The building' s supervisor told to my sister that she cannot change anything without the administrative office consent. My sister was very disappointed because she could not do things as her friends who have traditional houses did. Another conspicuous aspect that should be addressed in this explanation is that modern buildings are more expensive than normal houses. Living in an apartment requires a lot of expenses; one is the maintenance’s fee that each resident is supposed to pay each month. This is a nightmarish, and even if the apartment is empty, in other words if no one is living there, any way the owner has to pay the money. Hence, in a private house the matter is different because one can arrange things in a desire way, and no one will complain for that. Also, no maintains’ fee is required because we can clean by ourselves. The money that one saves from the maintain can use it for other things such as buying new trees for the yard or buying surveillance' s cameras. Even though, apartments are more secure than traditional houses because they have guardian and cameras, this is only a minor advantage that should be disregard because traditional houses' benefit overweigh apartments. Finally, for the reasons stated above, I outright support the fact that traditional houses are better than modern apartments because houses have more freedom and you can save money.
In
today&
#039; s hectic life
people
are not concurred upon their preference regarding ' ' living in
traditional
houses
or model
buildings&
#039; '
.
People
will provide
different
opinions about this topic and I consider that these concepts rely on
people&
#039; s culture, social status, and even family background. As far as
I&
#039; m concern, a
traditional
house
is much better than a
modern
apartment
, I based my view on the
next
arguments.

To
begin
with, in a
traditional
house
one have more freedom than a
modern
apartment
. An
apartment
complex is a place where
many
people
lives
. This place is
really
secured
because
it has 24 hours surveillance and guardians,
nevertheless
people
have to
share the same entrance and installations, and even they cannot
change
anything
that is
outside of
their
apartments
. To reflect this argument;
let&
#039; s refer to my sister
Wendys
who has
lived
in a
beautiful
building
for one year. At the beginning she was happy
because
there was
enough
space and peace for her children, notwithstanding the history took another course when she wanted to
make
a renovation in her parking space. The
building&
#039; s supervisor
told
to my sister that she cannot
change
anything without the administrative office consent. My sister was
very
disappointed
because
she could not do things as her friends who have
traditional
houses
did.

Another conspicuous aspect that should
be addressed
in this explanation is that
modern
buildings
are more expensive than normal
houses
. Living in an
apartment
requires
a lot of
expenses; one is the maintenance’s fee that each resident
is supposed
to pay each month. This is a nightmarish, and even if the
apartment
is empty,
in other words
if no one is living there, any way the owner
has to
pay the money.
Hence
, in a private
house
the matter is
different
because
one can arrange things in a desire way, and no one will
complain for
that.
Also
, no maintains’ fee
is required
because
we can clean by ourselves. The money that one saves from
the maintain
can
use
it for other things such as buying new trees for the yard or buying
surveillance&
#039; s cameras.

Even though
,
apartments
are more secure than
traditional
houses
because
they have guardian and cameras, this is
only
a minor advantage that should be disregard
because
traditional
houses&
#039; benefit
overweigh
apartments
.
Finally
, for the reasons stated above, I outright support the fact that
traditional
houses
are better than
modern
apartments
because
houses
have more freedom and you can save money.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
39Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Mistakes

IELTS essay Would you prefer to live in a traditional house or in a modern apartmentbuilding? Use specific reasons and details to support your choice. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
420 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts