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workers who do several tasks during the workdays are more satisfies than those who do similar work all day long? v.2

workers who do several tasks during the workdays are more satisfies than those who do similar work all day long? v. 2
Since the beginning of the current century, the turning over rate have been changes drastically. Given that people got bored from their jobs, they left them searching for new opportunities. Some people believe that workers would be more satisfied if they do same tasks during their workday; however, there is a substantial body of evidence that casts doubts on this belief. From a personal perspective, works should do several roles in their jobs; in order to ameliorate their responsibilities, productivity and experience. Below I will strive to explain my supporting points in more detail. The first and foremost point, provided that workers involved in a variety tasks, they could improve their productivity. A recent survey conducted by Oxford University found that companies that gave their employees change to do many roles could achieve a consider economic success. Furthermore, doing a variety of work responsibilities not only could amplify workers’ experience; but also, their mental well-being. Consequently, having many different tasks during the workday is imperative. Next, coupled with productivity, experience is another benefit of involving in many tasks. A vivid example that could be given to shed light on what was elaborated above is big companies, such as Costco and Walmart let costumer serves employees do plenty of roles, such as purchasing items, returning items and solving costumers’ problems. Likewise, carrying out different tasks could promote workers’ experience and multitasks skill. Therefore, doing a variety of roles has striking impact on workers’ personality. Ultimately, having many work-related activities could enhance employees’ responsibility. For instance, pharmacists who do several tasks during their workdays, such as answering phone calls, counselling patients and reviewing prescriptions could augments their ability to manage the flow of the work in the pharmacy. Although doing multitasks put workers under severe pressure, it could cement their skills and help them to get better jobs with better wages. As a result, having the multitasks skill is crucial for employees to pull up their future with a lot of thrives and prosperity. Taking everything into consideration; without a doubt, workers who do many different tasks during the workdays are more satisfied than those who do similar task along the day. It is suggested that companies design new programs that could help their employees to enhance multitask skills.
Since the beginning of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
century, the turning over rate have been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
drastically
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Given
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
bored from their jobs, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
them searching for new opportunities.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
would be more satisfied if they do same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tasks
during their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workday
;
however
, there is a substantial body of evidence that casts doubts on this belief. From a personal perspective, works should do several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roles
in their jobs; in order to ameliorate their responsibilities, productivity and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
. Below I will strive to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
my supporting points in more detail.

The
first
and foremost point, provided that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
involved in a variety
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tasks
, they could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their productivity. A recent survey conducted by Oxford University found that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
that gave their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roles
could achieve
After 'a', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'consider' is correct. If 'consider' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
a consider
economic success.
Furthermore
, doing a variety of work responsibilities not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
could amplify
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers’
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
;
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
, their mental well-being.
Consequently
, having
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tasks
during the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workday
is imperative.

Next
, coupled with productivity,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
is another benefit of involving in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tasks
. A vivid example that could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to shed light on what
was elaborated
above is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
, such as Costco and Walmart
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
costumer serves
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roles
, such as purchasing items, returning items and solving costumers’ problems.
Likewise
, carrying out
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tasks
could promote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers’
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
and multitasks
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
.
Therefore
, doing a variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roles
has striking impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers’
personality.

Ultimately
, having
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
work-related activities could enhance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees’
responsibility.
For instance
, pharmacists who do several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tasks
during their workdays, such as answering phone calls, counselling patients and reviewing prescriptions could
The verb 'could' requires the base form of the verb: "augment"
augments
their ability to manage the flow of the work in the pharmacy. Although doing multitasks put
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
under severe pressure, it could cement their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
better jobs with better wages.
As a result
, having the multitasks
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
is crucial for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
to pull up their future with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
thrives and prosperity.

Taking everything into consideration; without a doubt,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
who do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tasks
during the workdays are more satisfied than those who do similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
task
along the day. It
is suggested
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
design new programs that could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
to enhance multitask
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
34Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes
Language is not a genetic gift, it is a social gift. Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay workers who do several tasks during the workdays are more satisfies than those who do similar work all day long? v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
377 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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