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Workers are retired when they are 60.Some persons think that they should work how much they want. Do you agree or disagree.

Workers are retired when they are 60. Some persons think that they should work how much they want. XD3DE
It is true that the administration demand for retiring nations at certain ages after 60. Nonetheless, numerous are of the belief that desired working time length ought to be phased in. On my mind, allowing workers to continue career as long as they want is wrong and therefore, l am in broad disagreement to this standpoint. Thus, this essay will demonstrate my opposite notions to the wits through granting several illustrations in this behaved. First and foremost, there is no doubt that because of he quantity of studious youngs is increasing in a considerable rate around the globe, new graduates are insisting on more jobs from companies, exactly older workers are being retrieved as a barrier via occludinng opportunities to new manpower staffs with co-opting superfluous workplaces. The main reason for believing this is that stafffing possess more experience and knowledge taught in contemporary universities related to scientific advancements. Moreover, all staffs are retired when they reach 60 years old in a significant number of countries due to the fact that most of doctors remark about crowd become lethargic and bored from working deeds in the series of age, obviously the condition causes to emerging droppings in not only quality, but also quantity of tasks though both of them are supposed one of the most critical features of progress and regular improvement among competitors. Thus, graduates' diligence and frevency bring benefit in this trend to achieve success. In addition to, senior citizens come across too many health matters and pressure during working extra owing to the fact that they are weak in medical and mental ways. To sum up, permitting older workers to be in their career as long as they desired is restricting the young's chance to find a job. Furthermore, people in old ages become tired in psychological and physical behaveds.
It is true that the administration demand for retiring nations at certain ages after 60. Nonetheless, numerous are of the belief that desired working time length ought to
be phased
in. On my mind, allowing workers to continue career as long as they want is
wrong
and
therefore
, l am in broad disagreement to this standpoint.
Thus
, this essay will demonstrate my opposite notions to the wits through granting several illustrations in this behaved.
First
and foremost, there is no doubt that
because of he
quantity of studious
youngs
is increasing in a considerable rate around the globe, new graduates are insisting on more jobs from
companies
, exactly older workers are
being retrieved
as a barrier via
occludinng
opportunities to new manpower staffs with co-opting superfluous workplaces. The main reason for believing this is that
stafffing
possess more experience and knowledge taught in contemporary universities related to scientific advancements.
Moreover
, all staffs
are retired
when they reach 60 years
old
in a significant number of countries due to the fact that
most of doctors
remark about crowd become lethargic and bored from working deeds in the series of age,
obviously
the condition causes to emerging droppings in not
only
quality,
but
also
quantity of tasks though both of them
are supposed
one of the most critical features of progress and regular improvement among competitors.
Thus
, graduates' diligence and
frevency
bring benefit in this trend to achieve success.
In addition
to, senior citizens
come
across too
many
health matters and pressure during working extra owing to the fact that they are weak in medical and mental ways. To sum up, permitting older workers to be in their career as long as they desired is restricting the young's chance to find a job.
Furthermore
,
people
in
old
ages become tired in psychological and physical
behaveds
.
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IELTS essay Workers are retired when they are 60. Some persons think that they should work how much they want.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
303 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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