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Women movements for gender equality and to establish rights have changed gender roles. Some people think that this has led to an increase in juvenile delinquency and divorce rate. To what extent do you agree with this view?

Women movements for gender equality and to establish rights have changed gender roles. Some people think that this has led to an increase in juvenile delinquency and divorce rate. Ypkm
Feminism, has challenged many traditional concepts on gender roles and raised various relevant issues. While some people think that empowering women will have a deleterious impact on society, others argue that it will improve the quality of their lives, both at home and at work. This essay evaluates the impact of feminist movements on the social, political and economic life of women, and examines whether it has led to an increase in juvenile delinquency and divorce rate. To begin with, the collective assertiveness of women to establish their economic and political rights, and to struggle for equal opportunities in career is justifiable. In the changed global economic scenario, women should not be sidelined, as they have been exploited socially, economically and politically for ages. For instance, in some areas of India, my country, women are generally not free to travel at nigh, work and to marry as they prefer, due to cultural and religious restrictions. As such, it is natural for them to strive for equality with men, when they are deprived of their fundamental rights. However, it is true that there is an enormous increase in juvenile delinquency and break-up of relationships these days, but attributing all these to feminism is not rational. Alcoholism, drug addiction, physical assault and paranoia are but a few of the reasons for divorce. Juvenile delinquency has both genetic and environmental reasons. INstead of holding on to male chauvinist prejudices there are many men, who lead a contented family life, adapting to the changes in lifestyles. If women are accepted as they are, and their right to live with dignity and gender equality is respected, the chances for divorce will be remote. After analysing the above views, it can be stated that, since feminism is the struggle of women for equal rights with men, the earlier it is accepted the better it is. Attributing all the reasons for the increase in divorce rate and juvenile delinquency to movements of women, to my mind, is the manifestation of gender bias as it is a subjective approach. It is hoped that women empowerment will be taken positively by the future generations, without any bias or prejudice.
Feminism, has challenged
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
traditional concepts on gender roles and raised various relevant issues. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that empowering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
will have a deleterious impact on society, others argue that it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the quality of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
, both at home and at work. This essay evaluates the impact of feminist movements on the social, political and economic life of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
, and examines whether it has led to an increase in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
juvenile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
delinquency
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
divorce
rate.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the collective assertiveness of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
to establish their economic and political rights, and to struggle for equal opportunities in career is justifiable. In the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
global economic scenario,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
should not
be sidelined
, as they have
been exploited
socially
,
economically
and
politically
for ages.
For instance
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
areas of India, my country,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
are
generally
not free to travel at nigh, work and to marry as they prefer, due to cultural and religious restrictions. As such, it is natural for them to strive for equality with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
, when they
are deprived
of their fundamental rights.

However
, it is true that there is an enormous increase in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
juvenile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
delinquency
and break-up of relationships these days,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
attributing all these to feminism is not rational. Alcoholism, drug addiction, physical assault and paranoia are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
a few of the reasons for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
divorce
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Juvenile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
delinquency
has both genetic and environmental reasons.
Possible spelling mistake found.
INstead
of holding on to male chauvinist prejudices there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
, who lead a contented family life, adapting to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in lifestyles. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
as they are, and their right to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
with dignity and gender equality
is respected
, the chances for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
divorce
will be remote.

After
Possible spelling mistake. 'analysing' is British English.
analysing
the above views, it can
be stated
that, since feminism is the struggle of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
for equal rights with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
, the earlier it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
the better it is. Attributing all the reasons for the increase in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
divorce
rate and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
juvenile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
delinquency
to movements of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
, to my mind, is the manifestation of gender bias as it is a subjective approach. It
is hoped
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
empowerment will
be taken
positively
by the future generations, without any bias or prejudice.
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IELTS essay Women movements for gender equality and to establish rights have changed gender roles. Some people think that this has led to an increase in juvenile delinquency and divorce rate.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
360 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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    One main idea per paragraph
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Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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