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People nowadays sleep less than they used to in the past. What do you think is the reason behind this? What are the effects on individuals and people around them?

People nowadays sleep less than they used to in the past. What do you think is the reason behind this? What are the effects on individuals and people around them? dRpE
In the modern world people have less sleep in comparison with their ancestors. In my opinion, this is because of increasing number of working hours which further makes people feel more fatigue and unhappy. Individuals due to overworking don’t get enough sleep than they used to before. The main reason behind this is high competition between employees. In the modern world, male and female celebrities, businessmen, businesswomen and all in all the most recognized people as Bill Gates, Oprah, Madonna, Will Smith and etc. suggest that the key to success is hard work, starting the day very early which means having 5-6 hours of sleep when the recommended hours of sleep by scientist is approximately 8 hours of night sleep per day. People who take them as an example may contribute less of their time on sleep and more on hard work. As it’s well known that sleep is essential for human’s health and underestimating night sleep and working more than people are asked to can cause a lot of health problems, especially problems with nervous system and can have an effect on overall person’s mood. For instance, people who don’t get enough sleep are tend to drink a lot of caffeine in order to get through another challenging day at the office, in a result what causes caffeine addiction. Drinking too much caffeine throughout the day may give an illusionary feeling of energy, however it just blunts the feeling of tiredness but doesn’t solve the problem with sleep conditions. People who usually overwork and sleep less feel more tired and sad than those who balance out their time and don’t hesitate to sleep when they feel like it. Overall, the main reason of under sleeping is increasing number of working hours, which further causes caffeine addiction, weariness, unsatisfaction and unhappiness with their lives.
In the modern world
people
have less
sleep
in comparison
with their ancestors. In my opinion, this is
because
of increasing number of working
hours
which
further
makes
people
feel more fatigue and unhappy.

Individuals due to overworking don’t
get
enough
sleep
than they
used
to
before
. The main reason behind this is high competition between employees. In the modern world, male and female celebrities, businessmen, businesswomen and all in all the most recognized
people
as Bill Gates, Oprah, Madonna, Will Smith
and etc
. suggest that the key to success is
hard
work, starting the day
very
early which means having 5-6
hours
of
sleep
when the recommended
hours
of
sleep
by scientist is approximately 8
hours
of night
sleep
per day.
People
who
take them as an example may contribute less of their time on
sleep
and more on
hard
work.

As it’s well known that
sleep
is essential for human’s health and underestimating night
sleep
and working more than
people
are
asked to
can cause
a lot of
health problems,
especially
problems with nervous system and can have an effect on
overall
person’s mood.
For instance
,
people
who
don’t
get
enough
sleep
are tend to drink
a lot of
caffeine
in order to
get
through another challenging day at the office, in a result what causes
caffeine
addiction. Drinking too much
caffeine
throughout the day may give an illusionary feeling of energy,
however
it
just
blunts the feeling of tiredness
but
doesn’t solve the problem with
sleep
conditions.
People
who
usually
overwork and
sleep
less feel more tired and sad than those
who
balance out their time and don’t hesitate to
sleep
when they feel like it.

Overall
, the main reason of under sleeping is increasing number of working
hours
, which
further
causes
caffeine
addiction, weariness, unsatisfaction and unhappiness with their
lives
.
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IELTS essay People nowadays sleep less than they used to in the past. What do you think is the reason behind this? What are the effects on individuals and people around them?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
304 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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