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“WOMEN CAN’T LEAD. WOMEN CAN’T WIN. THEY WILL ALWAYS BE OUTSMARTED AND OUTMUSCLED. THEY NEED TO FINALLY UNDERSTAND THAT WHAT THEY CAN AND SHOULD DO IS SHUT UP, KNOW THEIR PLACE AND MAKE ME A GOD DAMN SANDWICH”.

“WOMEN CAN’T LEAD. WOMEN CAN’T WIN. THEY WILL ALWAYS BE OUTSMARTED AND OUTMUSCLED. THEY NEED TO FINALLY UNDERSTAND THAT WHAT THEY CAN AND SHOULD DO IS SHUT UP, KNOW THEIR PLACE AND MAKE ME A GOD DAMN SANDWICH”. bOx0Q
“WOMEN CAN’T LEAD. WOMEN CAN’T WIN. THEY WILL ALWAYS BE OUTSMARTED AND OUTMUSCLED. THEY NEED TO FINALLY UNDERSTAND THAT WHAT THEY CAN AND SHOULD DO IS SHUT UP, KNOW THEIR PLACE AND MAKE ME A GOD DAMN SANDWICH”. Abusing and pointing the gun, that’s what he could do. I could clearly feel my heart beating faster as the sound of the speakers was getting louder. “Clack”, fortunately, there were no bullets inside the gun and the sighs of relief from classmates were also heard. She was so calm and said, “You are wrong”. To prove those things were true, she won the presidential candidate. The movie was over and the lights were on. Indeed, the movie "American Horror Story" is really interesting. As a fan of horror movies, I thought I would be impressed with the bloody scenes, but through that movie, I was impressed by the brave, independence, and power of that girl. And at the same time, the phrase “leadership” has opened up in me countless urges to seek and discover. Are women also extremely shining with the sound of leadership? Vietnamese women in wartime and ethnic minority women also were applied a number of “tags” that girls couldn’t go to school and ought to get married, women had to do the housework and couldn’t eat with men on the table, . . . Those things made me think a lot, why there are still mostly women who still have no voice in society, or why they are always assumed that they can't do great things like breadwinners or become a director? After months of thinking, I decided to learn more about the phrase "leadership", at the same time I participated in projects to be able to explore this concept more deeply. In addition, I would experience more and had the goal of becoming a leader. Through extracurricular activities and watching the news, I realize more and more clearly the progress of women in peacetime and the growing feminism in the world. -In order to better understand myself, discover "leadership", and aim for social impact, I became an ambassador of AIESEC. Through these experiences, I applied to be the leader. It seems that the process of self-development was easy, but it was not. When I was first given the responsibility of a manager, it was extremely stressful because I didn't know how to properly divide the work; pressure from not knowing how to make teammates work effectively. With that first attempt, I completely failed as everyone wanted to withdraw from the group. But I didn’t give up or get discouraged, I have changed myself through listening and accepting criticism, changing the way of working by making people work with joy, delegating tasks to the right people, organize reviews and comments every week. After that change, my team won the award "The best ambassador team" and I was awarded the title "Excellent ambassador". The next time I came back to AIESEC, I participated in the contest ". . . . . . ", although I did not become a leader, but I did a good job as a leader for myself through giving feedback to the team, working responsibly, fully participating in training sessions, . . . And luckily once again, my team won the award "Fast-moving- Runner up". At that time, I realized that leadership is everywhere, it is not necessary to be the leader of a group, but we can be the leader for ourselves. In addition to “leadership”, I also got a better understanding of the core value of social impact through the Sustainable Development Goals (SDGs) of the United Nations when participating in activities on marine environmental protection and being a small part of it in the development of Vietnamese education such as participating in a career orientation for high school students, joining writing competition "peer pressure of students". Moreover, I participated in a volunteer music night of the Phedra Project through the photographer. In addition to developing soft skills in photography, I also contribute to poor children and orphans in the locality. -Leadership skills have also helped me a lot in art and sports activities at school. It is not enough to develop leadership through extracurricular activities, we must develop it through education. I have self-study IELTS at home, learn more about Powerpoint through the MOS test, design skills, and Marketing. Drawing and playing piano are also a way for me to develop that skill by completing the performance well, accurately conveying the color and message of the picture. -Through my journey of self-discovery, I realized that I am well suited for writing, designing, photography, and very interested in advertising products. Not only that, but I'm also very suitable for managing teams and exploring the development of women and feminism. And I have found a major that I am very interested in and suitable for which is “Public Relations” and “Women's Studies”. No matter what major I study, I will equip myself with a lot of skills. soft skills to be able to successfully complete volunteer work, sports, extracurricular activities study at school, in addition, if given the opportunity, I want to once again become a leader, become a class monitor at Mount Saint Vincent University. -Through my own research, I decided to become Mystic at MSVU. First and foremost, I see an association between the field's value and my value. To be honest, the first time I discover The Mount, I was attracted by the leadership and the development of women which The Mount is towards. My priority aspiration is Public Relations, through the school's Youtube channel, it is extremely easy for me to discover and compare majors, and I find myself really suitable for the PR industry through my skills and interests. This is a fun fact, with my Asian's traditional culture, each person in each age are have a lucky color, and with me, my lucky dye is blue and I believe that with the main blue tone of the Mount, I will feel more confident in myself, more convenient in learning. Along with a high quality of education, a multicultural environment, and creative research opportunities in Canada, I am sure that will fulfill the mission of students in school and your country. -In the future, after completing my bachelor's program at the school, I will continue to study a master's program in the field of "PR" and apply for a work permit for 3 years after studying. Next, I will return to Vietnam to develop the country's society and economy while bringing the essence of myself while studying in Canada. -Although my score is not high compared to my peers, I am still very confident with what I have tried in the past. Knowing that my strengths are not the main subjects in high school, but I still do not give up and always strive to achieve the title of “good student” in grades 11, 12. In addition, I do not use the difficulty of studying as a "shield" for laziness, I have sought out extracurricular activities to develop myself and contribute to the development of Vietnamese society, always try to learn more soft skills and certificates to use for the more convenient learning process at Mount Saint Vincent University. -Maturity is not measured by age, but by experience. After a long process of self-discovery, I have clearly identified and developed my strengths - Leadership and Public Relations
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
“WOMEN
CAN’T LEAD.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
WOMEN
CAN’T WIN. THEY WILL ALWAYS
BE OUTSMARTED
AND
Possible spelling mistake found.
OUTMUSCLED
. THEY NEED TO
FINALLY
UNDERSTAND THAT WHAT THEY CAN AND SHOULD DO
IS SHUT
UP, KNOW THEIR PLACE AND
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
MAKE
ME A GOD DAMN SANDWICH”.

Abusing and pointing the gun, that’s what he could do. I could
clearly
feel my heart beating faster as the sound of the speakers was getting louder. “Clack”,
fortunately
, there were no bullets inside the gun and the sighs of relief from classmates were
also
heard. She was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
calm and said, “You are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
”. To prove those things were true, she won the presidential candidate.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
was over and the lights were on.
Indeed
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
American Horror Story
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
is
The extreme adjective for interesting is "fascinating", or "exciting".
really interesting
. As a fan of horror
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
I would
be impressed
with the bloody scenes,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
, I
was impressed
by the brave, independence, and power of that girl. And at the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, the phrase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
“leadership”
has opened up in me countless urges to seek and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
discover
. Are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
also
extremely
shining with the sound of leadership?

Vietnamese
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
in wartime and ethnic minority
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
also
were applied
a number of “tags” that girls couldn’t go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
and ought to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
married,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
had to do the housework and couldn’t eat with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
on the table
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Those things made me
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
a lot, why there are
still
mostly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
who
still
have no voice in society, or why they are always assumed that they can't do great things like breadwinners or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
a director? After months of thinking, I decided to learn more about the phrase
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
leadership
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
, at the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
I participated in projects to be able to explore this concept more
deeply
. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
addition
, I would experience more and had the goal of becoming a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leader
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extracurricular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
and watching the news, I realize more and more
clearly
the progress of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
in peacetime and the growing feminism in the world.

-In order to better understand myself,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
discover
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
leadership
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
, and aim for social impact, I became an ambassador of AIESEC.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Through
these experiences, I applied to be the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leader
. It seems that the process of self-development was easy,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it was not. When I was
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
first
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the responsibility of a manager, it was
extremely
stressful
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I didn't know how to
properly
divide the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
; pressure from not knowing how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
teammates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
effectively
. With that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
first
attempt, I completely failed as everyone wanted to withdraw from the group.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
I didn’t give up or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
discouraged, I have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
myself
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
listening and accepting criticism, changing the way of working by making
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
with joy, delegating tasks to the right
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, organize reviews and comments every week. After that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
won the award
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
The best ambassador team
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
and I
was awarded
the title
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Excellent ambassador
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
. The
next
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
I came back to AIESEC, I participated in the contest
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
, although I did not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leader
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I did a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
job as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leader
for myself
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
giving feedback to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
, working
responsibly
,
fully
participating in training sessions
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
And luckily once again, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
won the award
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Fast
-moving- Runner up
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
. At that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, I realized that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leadership
is everywhere, it is not necessary to be the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leader
of a group,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we can be the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leader
for ourselves. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
addition
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
“leadership”
, I
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
a better understanding of the core value of social impact
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
the Sustainable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Development
Goals (
Possible spelling mistake found.
SDGs
) of the United Nations when participating in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
on marine environmental protection and being a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
part of it in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of Vietnamese education such as participating in a career orientation for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, joining writing competition
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
peer pressure of students
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
.
Moreover
, I participated in a volunteer music night of the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Phedra
Project
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
the photographer. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
addition
to developing soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
in photography, I
also
contribute to poor children and orphans in the locality.

-Leadership
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
have
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
me a lot in art and sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. It is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
develop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leadership
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extracurricular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
develop
it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
education. I have self-study IELTS at home, learn more about
Did you mean "PowerPoint" (= Microsoft presentation software)?
Powerpoint
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
the MOS
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
test
, design
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
, and Marketing. Drawing and playing piano are
also
a way for me to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
develop
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
by completing the performance well,
accurately
conveying the color and message of the picture.

-Through my journey of self-discovery, I realized that I am well suited for writing, designing, photography, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
interested in advertising products. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I'm
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
suitable for managing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teams
and exploring the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
and feminism. And I have found a major that I am
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
interested in and suitable for which is “Public Relations” and “Women's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Studies”
. No matter what major I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
, I will equip myself with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
to be able to
successfully
complete volunteer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, sports,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extracurricular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
addition
, if
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the opportunity, I want to once again
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leader
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
monitor at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Mount
Saint Vincent University.

-Through my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
research, I decided to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
Mystic at
Possible spelling mistake found.
MSVU
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
First
and foremost, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
an association between the field's value and my value. To be honest, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
discover
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Mount
, I
was attracted
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leadership
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
which The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Mount
is towards. My priority aspiration is Public Relations,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
the school's
Possible spelling mistake found.
Youtube
channel, it is
extremely
easy for me to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
discover
and compare majors, and I find myself
really
suitable for the PR industry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
and interests. This is a fun fact, with my Asian's traditional culture, each person in each age are
Consider using a past participle here: "had".
have
a lucky color, and with me, my lucky dye is blue and I believe that with the main blue tone of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Mount
, I will feel more confident in myself, more convenient in learning. Along with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
quality of education, a multicultural environment, and creative research opportunities in Canada, I am sure that will fulfill the mission of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
and your country.

-In the future, after completing my bachelor's program at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, I will continue to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
a master's program in the field of
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
PR
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
and apply for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
permit for 3 years after studying.
Next
, I will return to Vietnam to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
develop
the country's society and economy while bringing the essence of myself while studying in Canada.

-Although my score is not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
compared to my peers, I am
still
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
confident with what I have tried in the past. Knowing that my strengths are not the main subjects in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I
still
do not give up and always strive to achieve the title of “
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student”
in grades 11, 12. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
addition
, I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the difficulty of studying as a
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
shield
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
for laziness, I have sought out
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extracurricular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
develop
myself and contribute to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of Vietnamese society, always try to learn more soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
and certificates to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
for the more convenient learning process at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Mount
Saint Vincent University.

-Maturity is not measured by age,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
by experience. After a long process of self-discovery, I have
clearly
identified and developed my strengths
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Leadership
and Public
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
Relations
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IELTS essay “WOMEN CAN’T LEAD. WOMEN CAN’T WIN. THEY WILL ALWAYS BE OUTSMARTED AND OUTMUSCLED. THEY NEED TO FINALLY UNDERSTAND THAT WHAT THEY CAN AND SHOULD DO IS SHUT UP, KNOW THEIR PLACE AND MAKE ME A GOD DAMN SANDWICH”.

Essay
  American English
11 paragraphs
1237 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • “WOMEN CAN’T LEAD. WOMEN CAN’T WIN. THEY WILL ALWAYS BE OUTSMARTED AND OUTMUSCLED. THEY NEED TO FINALLY UNDERSTAND THAT WHAT THEY CAN AND SHOULD DO IS SHUT UP, KNOW THEIR PLACE AND MAKE ME A GOD DAMN SANDWICH”.