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some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for every type of crimes

some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for every type of crimes 52aXN
Some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for each type of crime nowadays. Many people think that punishments for the crime is not given properly. However, majority of people around think that this problem can affect the future society. I strongly agree that the there should be fixed punishments for each type of crime. In olden days the crime counts in the city or around were very less. The people who do the crime were afraid to attempt the crime. There was no technologies that time, so people had no idea to do crime or a mistake. Rules were followed by the people correctly. So when technology came people started seeing many things through technologies such as smart phones, smart tv, internet etc. for example, I saw a small boy taking a purse from a old man who is sitting and travelling in the bus. So, mostly young people came to use more smartphones now. Nowadays young persons are forced to attempt a crime like theft, pit pocket etc. There are many ways to stop this type of crime. First thing children below 18 years should not be allowed to use technologies. So they we can stop young people from committing a crime. The people who attempt to do a small bad thinks should pay fine about a large amount, example, not following the road signal. The person who commits big crime like stealing car has to be punished in the fixed punishments basis. So next time he should think about the punishments before attempting a crime. In conclusion, there should be fixed punishments for each type of crime because the future generation and the future society may get affected. To mitigate such an impact, perfect punishments have to be fined to the crimes done and young people have to stop using technologies. So this will help you to stop the crime in upcoming days.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that there should be
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fixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishments
for each
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type
of
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crime
nowadays.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
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people
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think
that
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punishments
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
properly
.
However
,
It seems that an article is missing.
majority of
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people
around
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think
that this problem can affect the future society. I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the there should be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishments
for each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
type
of crime.

In olden days the
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crime
counts in the city or around were
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very
less. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
do the
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crime
were afraid to attempt the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
. There was no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
that time,
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so
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people
had no
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idea
to do
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crime
or a mistake.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Rules
were followed
by the
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people
correctly
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
when
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technology
came
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
seeing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
such as smart phones, smart
Possible spelling mistake found.
tv
, internet etc.
for example
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
boy taking a purse from
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
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who
is sitting and travelling in the bus.
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So
,
mostly
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young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
came to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
more smartphones
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
. Nowadays
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young
persons
are forced
to attempt a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
like theft, pit pocket etc.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways to
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stop
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
type
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
First
thing children below 18 years should not be
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allowed
to
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use
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technologies
.
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So
they we can
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stop
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young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from committing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
. The
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people
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who
attempt to do a
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small
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
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thinks
should pay fine about a large amount, example, not following the road signal. The person
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who
commits
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
like stealing car
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be punished
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fixed
Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean "punishments'" or "punishment's"?
punishments
basis.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
next
time he should
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think
about the
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punishments
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
attempting a crime.

In conclusion
, there should be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fixed
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punishments
for each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
type
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the future generation and the future society may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
. To mitigate such an impact, perfect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishments
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be fined
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
done and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stop
using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stop
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
in upcoming days.
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IELTS essay some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for every type of crimes

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
317 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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