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Women can do everything that men can, and they even do it better. They also can do many things that men cannot. But there is a fact that their work is not appreciated as men's although they have to sacrifice a lot for their family and career. v.2

Women can do everything that men can, and they even do it better. They also can do many things that men cannot. But there is a fact that their work is not appreciated as men's although they have to sacrifice a lot for their family and career. v. 2
There is no doubt that women are contributing equally like men in the economic development of a country. Their rights are more realised now than they used to be in ancient times. Societies recognising efforts of men at work overworking woman is a common trend irrespective of their hard work and the sacrifice they make in their family and profession. Most people believe that they are more suited to home than at work. This essay will analyse the position of working women in society in the light of abilities, cultural norms and religious values. Firstly, Men are better adapted genetically to perform physical work, such as operating heavy machinery, cargo loading, digging etc. Women in such domains are not suited due to their structure and nature. For instance, sports, where competitions are primarily categorised on the basis of gender. It is the structure of women that mark the boundaries of what men can do and women cannot. On the other hand, women in nursing, elementary education and customer care services are preferred over men. This is because of their abilities to be patient, devotion, care and pliability. However, it has been argued that women are less esteemed in society due to their traditional roles at home. For instance in middle-east, where cultural and religious values demand women to stay back home and devote their time to raising children and fulfilling their household responsibilities. To conclude, differences do exist and are largely due to nature. Women place in the house or at work is largely governed by culture, tradition and religious value and not by their abilities.
There is no doubt that
women
are contributing
equally
like
men
in the economic development of a country. Their rights are more
realised
now
than they
used
to be in ancient times. Societies
recognising
efforts of
men
at
work
overworking woman is a common trend irrespective of their
hard
work
and the sacrifice they
make
in their family and profession. Most
people
believe that they are more suited to home than at
work
. This essay will
analyse
the position of working
women
in society in the light of abilities, cultural norms and religious values.

Firstly
,
Men
are better adapted
genetically
to perform physical
work
, such as operating heavy machinery, cargo loading, digging etc.
Women
in such domains are not suited due to their structure and nature.
For instance
, sports, where competitions are
primarily
categorised
on the basis of gender. It is the structure of
women
that mark the boundaries of what
men
can do and
women
cannot.
On the other hand
,
women
in nursing, elementary education and customer care services
are preferred
over
men
. This is
because
of their abilities to be patient, devotion, care and pliability.

However
, it has
been argued
that
women
are less esteemed in society due to their traditional roles at home.
For instance
in middle-east, where cultural and religious values demand
women
to stay back home and devote their time to raising children and fulfilling their household responsibilities.

To conclude
, differences do exist and are
largely
due to nature.
Women
place in the
house
or at
work
is
largely
governed by culture, tradition and religious value and not by their abilities.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Women can do everything that men can, and they even do it better. They also can do many things that men cannot. But there is a fact that their work is not appreciated as men's although they have to sacrifice a lot for their family and career. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
266 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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