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Woman's conditions in the world

Woman's conditions in the world kjgpR
Despite wemon are becoming a significant part of the society, we still behold some inequalities hence, we are still some way from obtaining gender equity. Statistics demonstrate that one fifth of the improvements caused by women's cooperation. In the past men considered rational and women were delicate therefore, they hardly ever received a position in the government but nowadays loads of things altert and they recruit in companies and received position in the government. Nevertheless they are attaining some prestigious position in the government, if we look carefully we see that major fallacies still exist. It can be because of several factors the most vital ones are ‏ prejudice and superstition. Men are envious creatures and the have never let women get interfering in some specific activities Consequently, l reckon if we let women to enhance their conditions in the world, we will observe improvements.
Despite
Possible spelling mistake found.
wemon
are becoming a significant part of the society, we
still
behold
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
inequalities
hence
, we are
still
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
way from obtaining gender equity. Statistics demonstrate that one fifth of the improvements caused by women's cooperation. In the past
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
considered rational and women were delicate
therefore
, they hardly ever received a position in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
nowadays loads of things
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
altert and
they recruit in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
and received position in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Nevertheless
they are attaining
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
prestigious position in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
, if we look
carefully
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that major fallacies
still
exist. It can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of several factors the most vital ones are ‏ prejudice and superstition.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Men
are envious creatures and the have never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
women
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
interfering in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
specific activities
Consequently
, l reckon if we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
women to enhance their conditions in the world, we will observe improvements.

IELTS essay Woman's conditions in the world

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
145 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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