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with divorce rates and family breakdowns increasingly globally

with divorce rates and family breakdowns increasingly globally BljX6
Owing to globalization, technology is increasing rapidly. Life of person becomes very hectic which were not in past time. In previous era people give preference to their custom and rituals. Which is totally finished in modern days. No one interfere in others life. Divorce and family sepration has increased. Lets discuss reasons and solution of this evil. Nowadays education play pivotal role in man's life. Women become independent. many professional jobs are occupied by ladies. They earn more then men in relevant fields. Both gender have no time for their children and house chores. It is main reason of their quarrel. Because of indendency they take quick decision of divorce. They both think their partner is not as not much as able for this relationship. other reason joint family breaking in neculer family. So no experienceable Person their who can make them understand. In past era people were illiterate. Women's only living at home all the day and take care their children. Men went out of house for work and farming. Because of this both of them dependent on each other for their living. Ladies coulnot afford food and daily life commodities without help of their husband. they donot divorces as compare of present days because of social societies and sake of embrasment. joint family is also other reason of this. Other side family breaking also one of main issue. Educated people want their privacy. They don't want to disclose about their personal matters to anyone. They have not enough time to care for their children. So they don't want to live with their parents after marriage. other reason is family pressure and burden would be increase if they live in big family. this breakdown were not in past life cause of they grow eatable food at own farm. And their living standard were not high. To conclude this issue, government should take some step to stop this high rating of divorce case. It's not only matter of government but also it's depends on individual they should think about their life and their children life. Children life is being spoiled by them. They don't proper take care in these type of cases. Their mentally and physically growth effect by parents separation
Owing to globalization, technology is increasing
rapidly
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Life
of person becomes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
hectic which were not in
Did you mean "pastime"?
past time
. In previous era
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
give preference to their custom and rituals.
“Which” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Which
is
totally
finished in modern days. No one interfere in others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Divorce
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
Possible spelling mistake found.
sepration
has increased.
Did you mean "Let's" (let's = let us; lets = 3rd person singular of 'let')?
Lets
discuss
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
and solution of this evil.

Nowadays education play pivotal role in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. Women become independent.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
many
professional jobs
are occupied
by ladies. They earn more
Comparison requires "than", not 'then' nor 'as'.
then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
in relevant fields. Both gender
Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: "has".
have
no time for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
chores. It is main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
of their quarrel.
“Because” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Because
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
indendency
they take quick decision of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
divorce
. They both
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
their partner is not as not much as able for this relationship.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
joint
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
breaking in
Possible spelling mistake found.
neculer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
no
Possible spelling mistake found.
experienceable
Person their who can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them understand.

In past era
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
were illiterate. Women's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
living at home all the day and take care their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Men
went out of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
for work and farming.
Because of this
both of them dependent on each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
for their living. Ladies
Possible spelling mistake found.
coulnot
afford food and daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
commodities without
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of their husband.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
they
Possible spelling mistake found.
donot
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
divorces
as compare of present days
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of social societies and sake of
Possible spelling mistake found.
embrasment
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
joint
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
is
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
of this.

Other side
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
breaking
also
one of main issue. Educated
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
want their privacy. They don't want to disclose about their personal matters to anyone. They have not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time to care for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
they don't want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
with their parents after marriage.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
pressure and burden would be increase if they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
this
breakdown were not in past
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
cause of they grow eatable food at
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
farm. And their living standard were not high.

To conclude
this issue,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should take
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
step to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
this high rating of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
divorce
case. It's not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
matter of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
it's depends on individual they should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is
being spoiled
by them. They don't proper take care in these type of cases. Their mentally and
physically
growth effect by parents
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
separation
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IELTS essay with divorce rates and family breakdowns increasingly globally

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
370 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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