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With deforestation, urban development and illegal hunting, many animal species are becoming endangered as they lose their habitats an some are even threatened to the point of extinction. Do you think it is important to protect animals? What measures can be taken to deal with this problem?

With deforestation, urban development and illegal hunting, many animal species are becoming endangered as they lose their habitats an some are even threatened to the point of extinction. Do you think it is important to protect animals? What measures can be taken to deal with this problem? x1qb
Biodiversity is the natures way to balance ecosystem, every living animal is co-dependent to the relative species around them. However, humans for decades have disrespected the thought of biodiversity to serve their selfish agenda. The below essay will elaborate why saving animals should the primary concern. TO begin with, why is biodiversity important? as we humans have evolved to be self dependent, we have stopped acknowledging the importance of co-dependency. For instance, pouching animals for their fur and other parts has reduced the number of tigers in Indian rain-forest, thereby, creating a imbalance in the ecosystem. The number of deer have increased drastically, consequently, decreasing the biodiversity of herbs and smaller plants that deer's usually feed on. Furthermore, smaller plans are important to refurbishing the minerals within the soil, subsequently, the forest soil is loosing its potency to house the vast biodiversity rain-forest has to offer. Additionally, de-forestation is escalating the problem in hand. With forest being cut down to house the increasing number of population, animals are left with more than half of their land being stripped off. For instance, Kollegal forest has lost 50% of its land to deforestation, furthermore, animals are now invading into human space. On the other hand, humans now have realized the importance of biodiversity, government has takes important steps to mitigate the damage done by humans. For example, the vast census done by the government of India to identify the exact number tigers living in India, they tagged every single tiger and started to track them to prevent pouching, moreover, strict laws are passed against pouching, this forces people to abide bu the law. These steps have yielded good results, now the number of tigers are increasing day by day. To conclude, although biodiversity is on a declining scale, mother nature has the ability to heal itself in an astonishing speed, if given enough time and care.
Biodiversity is the natures way to balance ecosystem, every living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
is co-dependent to the relative species around them.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
for decades have disrespected the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
of biodiversity to serve their selfish agenda. The below essay will elaborate why saving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
should the primary concern.

TO
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, why is biodiversity
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
?
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
as
we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
have evolved to be self dependent, we have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stopped
acknowledging the importance of co-dependency.
For instance
, pouching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
for their fur and other parts has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tigers
in Indian rain-forest, thereby, creating
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
imbalance in the ecosystem. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of deer
Did you mean "has"?
have
increased
drastically
,
consequently
, decreasing the biodiversity of herbs and smaller plants that deer's
usually
feed on.
Furthermore
, smaller plans are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to refurbishing the minerals within the soil,
subsequently
, the forest soil is loosing its potency to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
the vast biodiversity rain-forest
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
offer.
Additionally
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
de-forestation
is escalating the problem in hand. With forest being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
down to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
the increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of population,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
with more than half of their land
being stripped
off.
For instance
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kollegal
forest has lost 50% of its land to deforestation,
furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
invading into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
space.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
have realized the importance of biodiversity,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
has takes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
steps to mitigate the damage done by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
.
For example
, the vast census done by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
of India to identify the exact
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tigers
living in India, they tagged every single
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tiger
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
track
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
pouching,
moreover
, strict laws
are passed
against pouching, this forces
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to abide
Make sure that 'bu' is an abbreviation (bureau, bushel). Did you mean "by", "but", "bug", or "bus"?
bu
the law. These steps have yielded
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
results,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tigers
are increasing day by day.

To conclude
, although biodiversity is on a declining scale, mother nature has the ability to heal itself in an astonishing speed, if
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time and care.
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IELTS essay With deforestation, urban development and illegal hunting, many animal species are becoming endangered as they lose their habitats an some are even threatened to the point of extinction. Do you think it is important to protect animals? What measures can be taken to deal with this problem?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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