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Why do you think people attend collage or university?

Why do you think people attend collage or university? Kl3yN
There are several readons that why everyone attends collages and universities. In my opinion, I beleive that people attend there to gain new experiences, a new career and education. Firstly, if student attend collages it allows them to experience new things such as communicating eith others, that means meet some people that are different from them in terms of religion, behavior and values that help them to make a new friends. Secondly, nowadays profossional and specialized work is really inportant to earn money. So, students should attemd collages to have a job oppertunity. Moreover having knowladge and skills are neccessary for a career. Lastly, education is the most important reason to attend university. Because, having certification is important and practical for special works. In coclusion, I would recommond that people shoul attend university nit only for their future but also for the community in which they live.
There are several
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readons
that why everyone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attends
collages and universities. In my opinion, I
Possible spelling mistake found.
beleive
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attend
there to gain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
experiences, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
career and education.

Firstly
, if student
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attend
collages it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
them to experience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
things such as communicating
Possible spelling mistake found.
eith
others, that means
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
that are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
from them in terms of religion, behavior and values that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "friend"?
friends
.

Secondly
, nowadays
Possible spelling mistake found.
profossional
and specialized work is
really
Possible spelling mistake found.
inportant
to earn money.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, students should
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attemd
collages to have a job
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oppertunity
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Moreover
having
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knowladge
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
are
Possible spelling mistake found.
neccessary
for a career.

Lastly
, education is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
reason to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attend
university.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
, having certification is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and practical for special works.

In
Possible spelling mistake found.
coclusion
, I would
Possible spelling mistake found.
recommond
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
Possible spelling mistake found.
shoul
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attend
university nit
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for their future
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
for the community in which they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
.
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IELTS essay Why do you think people attend collage or university?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
147 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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