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Why do so many people in the world depend on fish as a major part of their diet? And does it have any effect? Can anything be done to change this?

Why do so many people in the world depend on fish as a major part of their diet? And does it have any effect? Can anything be done to change this? LqyrG
For many centuries, people have had fish as one of the top priorities in the human diet. However, problems associated with this habit are now threatening the longevity of both humans and nature. This essay attempts to shed light on why people take in a lot of fish and the solution to this problem. Firstly, fish is a major source of healthful long-chain omega-3 fats and other nutrients. Secondly, fish is an excellent source of protein, needed to maintain the body’s muscles, organs, and blood vessels. Lastly, fish consumption has been linked to a lower risk of fatal and total coronary cardiovascular disease (Qayoom, Mushtaq, Mir, & Gul, 2020). The omega-3 fats in fish prevent chronic disease and provide the evolution of brain. A study published in the Better Health Channel stated that fish consumption in older adults may be associated with a lower risk of developing dementia, including Alzheimer's disease. Although it is undeniable that eating fish can provide their body with many important nutrients, there is another end of the spectrum. Seafood consumption, which increases annual per-capita expenditures cost by about 1, 5%, in general, is harmful to health and indirectly harms the environment including overfishing and degradation of coral reefs, marine creatures through increased harvests (FDA, 2017). Moreover, overfishing and bycatch are some alarming issues, threatening billions of marine lives in the ocean and destroying the diversity of the ecosystem (World Wildlife, 2021). There are several solutions to maintain a healthy diet even without too many fish. Initially, the alternative could be beans, mushrooms, and other vegetables. Secondly, reduce their protein intake, and look for advisories. If there is no recommendation, restrict themselves to one serving per week (BBC Future, 2020). Finally, education and media are two potential ways to change fish addiction, as well as self-perceptions of their diet. To sum up, it is crystal clear that fish is a major and principal part of the diet, however, it should only be consumed in limited quantities. Controlling the proportion of fish is essential for the lifespan of both humans and nature.
For
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
centuries,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have had fish as one of the top priorities in the human diet.
However
, problems associated with this habit are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
threatening the longevity of both humans and nature. This essay attempts to shed light on why
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
take in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
fish and the solution to this problem.

Firstly
, fish is a major source of healthful long-chain omega-3 fats and other nutrients.
Secondly
, fish is an excellent source of protein, needed to maintain the body’s muscles, organs, and blood vessels.
Lastly
, fish consumption has
been linked
to a lower
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of fatal and total coronary cardiovascular disease (
Possible spelling mistake found.
Qayoom
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Mushtaq
, Mir, &
Possible spelling mistake found.
Gul
, 2020). The omega-3 fats in fish
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
chronic disease and provide the evolution of brain. A study published in the Better Health Channel stated that fish consumption in older adults may
be associated
with a lower
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of developing dementia, including Alzheimer's disease.

Although it is undeniable that eating fish can provide their body with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
nutrients, there is another
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the spectrum. Seafood consumption, which increases annual
Possible spelling mistake found.
per-capita
expenditures cost by about 1, 5%,
in general
, is harmful to health and
indirectly
harms the environment including overfishing and degradation of coral reefs, marine creatures through increased harvests (FDA, 2017).
Moreover
, overfishing and
Possible spelling mistake found.
bycatch
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
alarming issues, threatening billions of marine
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in the ocean and destroying the diversity of the ecosystem (World Wildlife, 2021).

There are several solutions to maintain a healthy diet even without too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
fish.
Initially
, the alternative could be beans, mushrooms, and other vegetables.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
their protein intake, and look for advisories. If there is no recommendation, restrict themselves to one serving per week (BBC Future, 2020).
Finally
, education and media are two potential ways to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
fish addiction,
as well
as self-perceptions of their diet.

To sum up, it is crystal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that fish is a major and principal part of the diet,
however
, it should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be consumed
in limited quantities. Controlling the proportion of fish is essential for the lifespan of both humans and nature.
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IELTS essay Why do so many people in the world depend on fish as a major part of their diet? And does it have any effect? Can anything be done to change this?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
345 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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