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Whoever controls media also controls the mind of people

Whoever controls media also controls the mind of people GrbKo
Variety of forms of media such as newspaper, new channels and online websites are nowadays are the face of the nation. Many believe that the thought process and decisions of general public are derived by these tools. However, I believe that information from these mediums ae only helping nationals to make the right decisions and not enforcing or manipulating them to do something what media houses looking for. In the past, it was observed that people used to agree to the information provided in the newspapers or displayed on different news shows, and they tend to be in agreement with the opinions of the news readers. Many a times, some political groups also tried to influence the public in a negative way by misleading them with incorrect details of the incidents. However, nowadays, the situation has drastically changed and nationals of any country are intelligent and smart enough to understand the difference between right and wrong. People only believe what they want to believe and cannot be influenced by media easily. Due to the availability of number of news telecasting tv channels and online portals such as YouTube and Facebook, it has become difficult to hide the actual facts of any situation or incident. In addition to this, as people are more educated than before, they are able to take the decision of whether they simply want to agree to whatever he news reader is saying or take a sensible call of whether to what extent the information is correct. To conclude, media is for the public and face of any nation. But, I disagree to the notion that it can control the perspective and attitudes of general public as now people look for authentic information and do not just believe and rely on news telecasted.
Variety of forms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
such as newspaper,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
channels and online websites are nowadays
Consider using a past participle here: "been".
are
the face of the nation.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
process and decisions of general
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
are derived
by these tools.
However
, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
from these mediums
Possible spelling mistake found.
ae
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
helping nationals to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the right decisions and not enforcing or manipulating them to do something what
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
looking for.

In the past, it
was observed
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
provided in the newspapers or displayed on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
, and they tend to be in agreement with the opinions of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
readers.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "a time" or simply "times"?
a times
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
political groups
also
tried to influence the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
way by misleading them with incorrect
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
of the incidents.

However
, nowadays, the situation has
drastically
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
and nationals of any country are intelligent and smart
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to understand the difference between right and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
what they want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
and cannot
be influenced
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
easily
. Due to the availability of number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
telecasting
Possible spelling mistake found.
tv
channels and online portals such as YouTube and Facebook, it has become difficult to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hide
the actual facts of any situation or incident.
In addition
to this, as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are more educated than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
, they are able to take the decision of whether they
simply
want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
to whatever he
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
reader is saying or take a sensible call of whether to what extent the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
is correct.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
and face of any nation.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, I disagree to the notion that it can control the perspective and attitudes of general
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
look for authentic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
and do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
and rely on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "telecast", the past tense form of the verb 'telecast'?
telecasted
.
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IELTS essay Whoever controls media also controls the mind of people

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
296 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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