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Who should be responsible for caring for the elderly? Should it be the family or the government?

Who should be responsible for caring for the elderly? Should it be the family or the government? Q8EyK
Consider even my grandparents and I can 50 over. So I have I'm close to all of them, mostly me to my parents and my sisters. I grew up with them, so the at home with them. But during the most important occasion, like pristine or birthdays to spend a lot of time on it. And I do free with Mike Lee until I will search when I decided to move here in. And so now it's already three year after that not living with them anymore. But I'm trying Twitter at least once a during the lockdown, the Bible. So all these kind of ever. So it was quite hard to go back to my hometown and visit them instead when I put it there, I used to spend a lot of time with my sister and we used to travel, spend a lot together and together for some shopping, for example, the side, all these kind of events. Yeah, I can I can see that. Yes. Most of the time I agree with my sister at the reason why we spend a lot of time together and even with my mom and dad instead the rest of my family. Yeah. There were a couple of times where we didn't agree at all, especially when I decided to move better now here in England because they didn't agree to when I decided to move in a different country, it was a different culture and different hats in general. In Natalie, we are closer to our family and we spend a lot of time on the all together. And the last time that I saw them was in September of the last year when I went there.
Consider even my grandparents and I
Did you mean "can use 50" or "can be 50"?
can 50
over.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
I have I'm close to all of them,
mostly
me to my parents and my sisters. I grew up with them,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the at home with them.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
during the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
occasion, like pristine or birthdays to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on it. And I do free with Mike Lee until I will search when I decided to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
here in.

And
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
it's already three year after that not living with them anymore.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
I'm trying Twitter at least once a during the lockdown, the Bible.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
all
Did you mean "this kind" or "these kinds"?
these kind
of ever.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
it was quite
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to go back to my hometown and visit them
instead
when I put it there, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with my
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
sister and
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to travel,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
together and together for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
shopping,
for example
, the side, all
Did you mean "this kind" or "these kinds"?
these kind
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
. Yeah,
This phrase is duplicated. You should probably leave only "I can".
I can I can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that.

Yes. Most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with my sister at the reason why we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
together and even with my mom and dad
instead
the rest of my family. Yeah. There were a couple of
It is better to use 'times' with the time-relative pronoun 'when': "times when". (Alternatively, use 'in/on which')
times where
we didn't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
at all,
especially
when I decided to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
better
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
here in England
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they didn't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
to when I decided to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
country, it was a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
culture and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
hats
in general
. In Natalie, we are closer to our
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
family and
we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on the all together.

And the last
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
that I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
them was in September of the last year when I went there.
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IELTS essay Who should be responsible for caring for the elderly? Should it be the family or the government?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
287 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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