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Which of the following three activities would you most prefer to do on a weekend afternoon? 1. Play sport2. Visit a friend3. Cook at home v.1

Which of the following three activities would you most prefer to do on a weekend afternoon? 1. Play sport2. Visit a friend3. Cook at home v. 1
In the era of globalization, travelling is an excellent way to broaden our philosophy and experience. Moreover, it offers us a first-hand experience of different places, cultures, customs. And some people say that transport with a group of people, including tour leader, is the best way. In this essay, I am going to discuss my opinion and draw the conclusion. In terms of the positive sides, travellers, who move to famous tourist destinations with a group, can have the opportunities to start a novel chat with the strangers, who are interested in the same places with you. The main reason given to support this claim is that people, who are extroverts, enjoy meeting new societies and cultures and share their ability to enrich their horizons and explore the world as well as themselves. Secondly, the guide leader is aware of the risk of the local region, which can be harmful to you, and immediately avoid that. For instance, some popular tourist places are the accommodation of tribes, from their experience and knowledge, they will plan the schedule and explain you vital places we should not pay a visit to. Furthermore, the guider is a professional who has consummate communication skills and extensive knowledge about historic places. We can not only learn about cultures and history of the famous tourist destinations, where we come from the journey, but also to study the soft skills, namely communication skills. In conclusion, travelling with a group of people, including guider, can ensure complete sightseeing without stress and as well as danger, which can affect to your physic and mental health. The tour leader can be the vital factor to make an impressive and fascinating trip.
In the era of globalization, travelling is an excellent way to broaden our philosophy and experience.
Moreover
, it offers us a
first
-hand experience of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
, cultures, customs. And
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
say that transport with a group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, including tour leader, is the best way. In this essay, I am going to discuss my opinion and draw the conclusion.

In terms of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
sides,
Possible spelling mistake found.
travellers
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
tourist destinations with a group, can have the opportunities to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
a novel chat with the strangers,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are interested
in the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
with you. The main reason
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to support this claim is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are extroverts, enjoy meeting new societies and cultures and share their ability to enrich their horizons and explore the world
as well
as themselves.

Secondly
, the guide leader is aware of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of the local region, which can be harmful to you, and immediately avoid that.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
popular tourist
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
are the accommodation of tribes, from their experience and knowledge, they will plan the schedule and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
you vital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
we should not pay a visit to.
Furthermore
, the guider is a professional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
has consummate communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and extensive knowledge about historic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
. We can not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
learn about cultures and history of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
tourist destinations, where we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from the journey,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to study the soft
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
,
namely
communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

In conclusion
, travelling with a group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, including guider, can ensure complete sightseeing without
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and
as well
as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
, which can affect to your physic and mental health. The tour leader can be the vital factor to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
an impressive and fascinating trip.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Which of the following three activities would you most prefer to do on a weekend afternoon? 1. Play sport2. Visit a friend3. Cook at home v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
281 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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