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Which do you prefer, working at home or in office?

Which do you prefer, working at home or in office? BJLEd
The formal and reserved life in the office never appeals to me. Admittedly, I see its ordered happiness, but a fever in my blood asks for a more free and spontaneous life. Therefore, I would choose to work at home without hesitation and present my reasons as follows. The main reason for my propensity is that working at home makes me feel relaxed and thus I could enhance my efficiency. As you see, working at home may offer you a great variety of comforts. You can stretch your legs out on the spacious desks, have the stereo on at full blast and enjoy the delicious food. You never have to worr. . .
The formal and reserved life in the office never appeals to me.
Admittedly
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
its ordered happiness,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
a fever in my blood
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
asks for
a more free and spontaneous life.
Therefore
, I would choose to work at home without hesitation and present my reasons as follows.

The main reason for my propensity is that working at home
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
me feel relaxed and
thus
I could enhance my efficiency. As you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
, working at home may offer you a great variety of comforts. You can stretch your legs out on the spacious desks, have the stereo on at full blast and enjoy the delicious food. You never
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
Possible spelling mistake found.
worr
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
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IELTS essay Which do you prefer, working at home or in office?

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
113 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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