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When people succeed because of hard work ; luck has nothing to do something for success

When people succeed because of hard work; luck has nothing to do something for success XELNr
Every people want to succeed at work or study in Their life and try to build a bright future. Although, many people claim that succeed in depends on hard work but I believe progress is not only depend on hard work but also need luck. There are many things to do for success. Hard work is one things. every people want to success in his life. Due to build a good carrier people spent lot of time, energy and try the highest but everyone can not shine. I remember. One my school friend who studied more more to pass in exam but unfortunately she was fail. Despite try to more and spent time at study, she was unlucky. without enough study in my student life some student make a good and they are also success in their carrier. On the other hand, luck is one of the best things which helps to prosper in life besides hardworking. For example, some student who are not good at study but pass in exam unintentional mistake of teacher. For this reason without hard they pass in exam for Favor. Many people in the World have not hardworking while they are progress in life because of intelligence. By doing same result some pupils can not admitted in University due to fail of admission test whenever some learner get chance by answering all question without know the right answer. In conclusion, though hard work is one of important thing of success but luck is another of secrete which need besides hard work to bright in life. One is related to another. .
'Each', 'every', 'either' and 'neither' are used with singular. Did you mean "all"?
Every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
want to succeed at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
in Their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and try to build a bright future. Although,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
claim that succeed in depends on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I believe progress is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
depend on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
need luck.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things to do for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is
Don't use the number 'one' with plural words. Did you mean "one thing", "a thing", or simply "things"?
one things
.
'Each', 'every', 'either' and 'neither' are used with singular. Did you mean "all"?
every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
in his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. Due to build a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
carrier
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
spent
It seems that an article is missing.
lot of
time, energy and try the highest
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
everyone can not shine. I remember. One my school friend who studied
Use only "more" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more more
to pass in exam
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
unfortunately she was fail. Despite try to more and spent time at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
, she was unlucky.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
without
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
in my student
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
student
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
good and
they are
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
in their carrier.

On the other hand
, luck is one of the best things which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to prosper in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
besides
hardworking.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
student who are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
pass in exam unintentional mistake of teacher.
For this reason
without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
they pass in exam for Favor.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the World have not hardworking while they are progress in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of intelligence. By doing same result
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
pupils can not
The verb 'can' requires base form of the verb: "admit"
admitted
in University due to fail of admission
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
test
whenever
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Did you mean "learners"?
learner
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
chance by answering all question without know the right answer.

In conclusion
, though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is one of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
thing of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
luck is another of secrete which need
besides
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
to bright in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. One
is related
to another.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
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IELTS essay When people succeed because of hard work; luck has nothing to do something for success

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
267 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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