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when it comes to educational quality, opinions are varied on what government can do to improve the quality of high school teachers.

when it comes to educational quality, opinions are varied on what government can do to improve the quality of high school teachers. VYxxA
when it comes to educational quality, opinions are varied on what government can do to improve the quality of high school teachers. a number of experts offer two ways including traditional education of a small group of them or holding online classes for all members. although both perspectives are merits, as far as I am concerned, the new teaching method is better. I will elaborate on my reasons in the following paragraphs. to begin with, holding online classes for all members is fair. with fierce competition in the modern era, employees especially teachers tend to show their own performance better than others. in this case, they rarely will transfer all things they were learned. because they only seeking their benefit. in addition, with the limitation of human capabilities including memory it is unlikely that they can teach learned material. the results of surveys show that under this circumstance, people forget special detail of lectures and can not teach like their own professors. my personal experience is a good example. several years ago, I was selected by my company as a representative to participate in the educational course provided holding a class for my colleague. although I am precise ultimately I could not have to teach all material that I was learned. besides above mentioned, online classes are more affordable. financial burdens of any project are the most important aspect that should be considered. prerequisite of holding traditional class is that the government pay expenses including traveling, accommodation, and entertainment. on the contrary, when participating in an online class, it is only necessary to sit in front of their own computers at home and listen to lectures that it is approximately free due to the pervasive of the internet in addition when taking part in a traditional class, tutors should seprate of the educational environment. hence they can not help their students. factoring above mentioned I can conclude that if the government want to improve quality of high school teaching methods it is better to hold an online class for all instructors because it is more effective and economic
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
when
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to educational quality, opinions
are varied
on what
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
can do to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the quality of high school teachers.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
a
number of experts offer two ways including traditional education of a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
group of them or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
for all members.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
although
both perspectives are merits, as far as I
am concerned
, the new teaching method is better. I will elaborate on my reasons in the following paragraphs.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
for all members is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
with
fierce competition in the modern era, employees
especially
teachers tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
performance better than others.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
this case, they
The adverb 'rarely' is usually put between 'will' and 'transfer'.
rarely will transfer
all things they
were learned
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
because
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
seeking their benefit.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
addition, with the limitation of human capabilities including memory it is unlikely that they can teach learned material.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
results of surveys
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that under this circumstance,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
forget special detail of lectures and can not teach like their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
professors.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
my
personal experience is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
example.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
several
years ago, I
was selected
by my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
as a representative to participate in the educational course provided
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holding
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
for my colleague.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
although
I am precise
ultimately
I could not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
teach all material that I
was learned
.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
besides
above mentioned,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
are more affordable.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
financial
burdens of any project are the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
aspect that should
be considered
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
prerequisite
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holding
traditional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
is that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
pay expenses including traveling, accommodation, and entertainment.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
on
the contrary, when participating in an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
necessary to sit in front of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
computers at home and listen to lectures that it is approximately free due to
The phrase 'the pervasive of' is not correct. Use a noun, not an adjective, between 'the' and 'of'.
the pervasive of
the internet
in addition
when taking part in a traditional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
, tutors should
Possible spelling mistake found.
seprate
of the educational environment.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
hence
they can not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
their students.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
factoring
above mentioned I can conclude that if the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
quality of high school teaching methods it is better to hold an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
for all instructors
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is more effective and economic
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IELTS essay when it comes to educational quality, opinions are varied on what government can do to improve the quality of high school teachers.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
347 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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