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What voluntary project would you like to engage in? why?

What voluntary project would you like to engage in? why? jbYDd
Have you ever heard about the poverty, poorness of the children in the remote area. This is the people who can’t eat full, wearing warm, . . . All over the years, in here haven’t the smile. So, project “ Smile of children” is launch. I love this project so I like participating in this. Project “Smile of children” is the organization which protect their happiness. The volunteer will bring the smile from all over the country to remote. I love to see the smile of children so this project is practical. The organization will give them food, clothes, the fresh water, the learning opportunities, . . . Furthermore, it connect me to others, make me new friends, contacts increase my social and relationship skill. So I can understand this place better to love more. Volunteering make me happy. The more I give, the happier I fell. Of course volunteering brings fun and fulfillment to my lifeSo, I love this project, I wish the project would grow bigger in the future.
Have you ever heard about the poverty, poorness of the
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children
in the remote area. This is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who can’t eat full, wearing warm
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, .
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.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
All over the years, in here haven’t the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smile
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
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project
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“
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Smile
of
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children”
is launch. I
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love
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I like participating in this.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Project
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
“Smile
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children”
is the organization which protect their happiness. The volunteer will bring the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smile
from all over the country to remote. I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
love
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smile
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
is practical. The organization will give them food, clothes, the fresh water, the learning opportunities
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Furthermore
, it
Did you mean "connects"?
connect
me to others,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
me new friends, contacts increase my social and relationship
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
I can understand this place better to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
love
more. Volunteering
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
me happy. The more I give, the happier I fell.
Of course
volunteering brings fun and fulfillment to my
Possible spelling mistake found.
lifeSo
, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
love
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
, I wish the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
would grow bigger in the future.
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IELTS essay What voluntary project would you like to engage in? why?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
171 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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