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Should young children be encouraged to follow strict rules based on their cultural traditions or allowed to behave freely?

Should young children be encouraged to follow strict rules based on their cultural traditions or allowed to behave freely? Edr6D
We always try to discover what is the best way to educate our children. Should they follow strict rules based on traditions, or could we leave them free to understand the world and behave as they prefer? I believe that traditions are very important but we should leave them as much freedom as we can, always supervising their behavior and being aware that a child can easily take the wrong pathway of life. From my point of view, imposing a strict code of rules to a child is something wrong that sometimes could also be harmful. We need to accept that the world is changing and many traditions and cultural habits have a minor role compared to the past. I believe that we should give them the right cultural and educational tools in order to make them ready to discover and understand the world, that nowadays is developing at an incredible pace. Nevertheless, we should always remember that traditions are very important. They are part of our history and part of the history of our city and our country. Without understanding the cultural traditions of our homeland, and thus our roots, we wouldn’t be able to understand the world in which we are living. Furthermore, knowing the culture which a child comes from, usually helps him to be aware of how people used to behave in the past, and this could positively influence his actual behavior. In conclusion, I strongly believe that we should leave the children a large degree of freedom, always trying to transmit traditions and values that should inspire and motivate good behavior.
We always try to discover what is the best way to educate our children. Should they follow strict
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
based on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
, or could we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
them free to understand the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
and behave as they prefer? I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
them as much freedom as we can, always supervising their behavior and being aware that a child can
easily
take the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
pathway of life.

From my point of view, imposing a strict code of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
to a child is something
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
could
also
be harmful. We need to accept that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
is changing and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
and cultural habits have a minor role compared to the past. I believe that we should give them the right cultural and educational tools in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them ready to discover and understand the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
, that nowadays is developing at an incredible pace.

Nevertheless
, we should always remember that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. They are part of our history and part of the history of our city and our country. Without understanding the cultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
of our homeland, and
thus
our roots, we wouldn’t be able to understand the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
in which we are living.
Furthermore
, knowing the culture which a child
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
from,
usually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
him to be aware of how
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to behave in the past, and this could
positively
influence his actual behavior.

In conclusion
, I
strongly
believe that we should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
the children a large degree of freedom, always trying to transmit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
and values that should inspire and motivate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
behavior.
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IELTS essay Should young children be encouraged to follow strict rules based on their cultural traditions or allowed to behave freely?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
266 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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