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what jobs are you studying and working for

what jobs are you studying and working for 5kxGP
I am a university student at the University of Industrial Fine Arts, my main job is to study. I am always happy with my current studies because this is my favorite university. I chose to be a student at the University of Industrial Arts because I like the fashion industry, it's also my father's job and I want to follow his career. Fashion design is also quite a popular job in Vietnam. The special thing about fashion design is that you can freely design clothes according to your taste and taste. I just want to do this job because I love fashion design. Fashion designers are people who create, research, and research to produce fashion works that help beautify people and their lives. I want to work for famous fashion brands or big fashion companies in Vietnam. When applying for a job, I need a university degree, I may need a certificate of English, which will be better. I want to be the most fashion designer because this is the job that I love and orient for the future, can also make a lot of money with this job. In my opinion, the most respected jobs are the doctors who save lives, the police or the police who protect the security and order to face dangers to protect the lives of people, the collectors. garbage they are the guardians for our living environment to be always clean. In recent years, our country has to face the Covid-19 epidemic, there have been many changes in the work that have been made such as many people have to work from home, work online, teachers have to teach. online, since then, many online jobs have been developed. Some of the important things that candidates should learn before taking the job are leveraging connections, needing a compelling resume, focusing on achievements, feeling about the company during the interview, Confident, patient and always thinking positively and not being discouraged.
I am a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
student at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
of Industrial Fine Arts, my main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is to study. I am always happy with my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
studies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this is my favorite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
chose to be a student at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
of Industrial Arts
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I like the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
industry, it's
also
my father's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
and I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to follow his career.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Fashion
design is
also
quite a popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
in Vietnam. The special thing about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
design is that you can
freely
design clothes according to your taste and taste. I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to do this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
design.

Fashion designers are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who create, research, and research to produce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
works that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
beautify
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
brands or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
in Vietnam. When applying for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
, I need a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
degree, I may need a certificate of English, which will be better. I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to be the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
designer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
that I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
and orient for the future, can
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
money with this job.

In my opinion, the most respected
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
are the doctors who save
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
, the police or the police who protect the security and order to face
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
dangers
to protect the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, the collectors.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
garbage
they are the guardians for our living environment to be always clean. In recent years, our country
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
face the Covid-19 epidemic, there have been
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
that have
been made
such as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from home,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
online, teachers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
teach.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
online
, since then,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
have
been developed
.
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
Some of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
things that candidates should learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
taking the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
are leveraging connections, needing a compelling resume, focusing on achievements, feeling about the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
during the interview, Confident, patient and always thinking
positively
and not
being discouraged
.
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IELTS essay what jobs are you studying and working for

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
324 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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