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what is your opinion about fortune telling?

what is your opinion about fortune telling? BWREj
Everyone has three periods of time in their life as past, present and future. Our past contains some good and bad events that can be affected our present and future. About the present, we live and experience new things at this moment. The third period and also an interesting part of our life that we like to know more about it and something will happen for us, is future. we always try to have and create a good future for our family and ourselves. This viewpoint shows we think mostly about the future in our life. Therefore, based on our personality it is very exciting to know about what will happen for us in the future. Based on this statement, future telling and predicting converts to a popular work around the world. This work has been done by using different things such as coffee, hand and etc. to tell about the future. Numbers of people believed that any predictions of these persons are right and they accept their future telling and try to follow the instructions of the predictor to have a good future. This view is not acceptable to me. I can reject this work by a question. If you decided to go to a place to hear about your future, please say from future teller this question: “what will happen for you by the 5 minutes later? ”. After this question, he/she answers something then you can do another thing that you heard. Therefore you can see predictor’s answer is just a prediction and cannot be reliable. Thus, telling about the future and what will happen is completely a prediction and in most cases are not true. This prediction can be an alarm for us to be careful about what we are doing at the present. I think we construct our future based on our plan, experience and exercise. We should live at the present and be pleased from it and hope to the future.
Everyone has three periods of time in their life as past,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
present
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
. Our past contains
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
that can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
present
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
. About the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
present
, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
and experience new things at this moment. The third period and
also
an interesting part of our life that we like to know more about it and something will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happen
for us, is future.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
we
always try to have and create a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
for our family and ourselves. This viewpoint
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
mostly
about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
in our life.
Therefore
, based on our personality it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
exciting to know about what will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happen
for us in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
. Based on this statement,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
telling and predicting converts to a popular work around the world. This work has
been done
by using
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
things such as coffee, hand
Write the name of the item after 'and' or use only "etc".
and etc
. to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
. Numbers of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believed that any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
predictions
of these persons are
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
right and
they accept their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
telling and try to follow the instructions of the predictor to have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
. This view is not acceptable to me. I can reject this work by a question. If you decided to go to a place to hear about your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
please
say from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
teller this question: “what will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happen
for you by the 5 minutes later? ”. After this question, he/she answers something then you can do another thing that you heard.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
predictor’s answer is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prediction
and cannot be reliable.

Thus
, telling about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
and what will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happen
is completely a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prediction
and
in most cases
are not true. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prediction
can be an alarm for us to be careful about what we are doing at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
present
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
we construct our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
based on our plan, experience and exercise. We should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
present
and be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
pleased
from it and hope to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
.
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IELTS essay what is your opinion about fortune telling?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
327 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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