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What influence our purchasing decisions? Do we mainly buy things because we need them, or are other factors involved?

What influence our purchasing decisions? Do we mainly buy things because we need them, or are other factors involved? GrjWw
With the development of financial these days, people are having more chance to buy things easily. Sometimes people will buy products that they do not think these are necessary. In conclusion, buying these unnecessary things makes people waste of money, and I do not agree that people make decisions that go against their real needs. Firstly, some people may buy a product because they see it on some fancy advertisements. People are more likely to buy products because celebrities have been employed to advertise them. They will feel that this products must be good to be advertised. For example, when a soccer player advertise for shoes and tell that this is recommended by him, people will spread that that shoes is used by a famous player and they will definitely want that too. The power of this type of advertisement are helping many company sold many products for their customers who are admire the advertisers. Secondly, people make a purchase just because their friends or relatives or collages have it. They want to be similar to their friends, they may feel less self-conscious or financially inferior than others. When hanging out with each other, they will not feel that they are imbalance with their friends, or maybe their relative tell them to buy it. Thirdly, sometimes people want to show that they have a lot of money, they could buy everything that is uncommon and everyone will look up at them. They think that products will makes the trend and who buy that will become a leader so that they will be famous in schools or company. In short, buying things without real needs will let people waste of money, and when they are too far, maybe they have no money to cover their real needs.
With the development of financial these days,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are having more chance to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
things
easily
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
that they do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
these are necessary.
In conclusion
, buying these unnecessary things
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
waste of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, and I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
decisions that go against their real needs.

Firstly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
it on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
fancy advertisements.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are more likely to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
celebrities have
been employed
to advertise them. They will feel that
Did you mean "these"?
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
to
be advertised
.
For example
, when a soccer player advertise for shoes and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
that this
is recommended
by him,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will spread that that shoes is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
player and
they will definitely want that too. The power of this type of advertisement are helping
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
sold
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
for their customers who are
Consider using a past participle here: "admired".
admire
the advertisers.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
their friends or relatives or collages have it. They want to be similar to their friends, they may feel less self-conscious or
financially
Some adjectives derived from Latin act as both adjective and comparative. In these cases use the collocation 'to'
inferior than
others. When hanging out with each other, they will not feel that they are imbalance with their friends, or maybe their relative
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
it.

Thirdly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that they have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, they could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
everything
that is
uncommon and everyone will look up at them. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
the trend and who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
that will become a leader
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they will be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
in schools or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.

In short, buying things without real needs will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
waste of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, and when they are too far, maybe they have no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to cover their real needs.
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IELTS essay What influence our purchasing decisions? Do we mainly buy things because we need them, or are other factors involved?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
296 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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