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What do you think is the most important quality of a working environment: good leaders, good colleagues, or flexible time? v.1

What do you think is the most important quality of a working environment: good leaders, good colleagues, or flexible time? v. 1
It is considered that promotional campaign to advertise products in the market are essential to excel in the business. In my opinion, I believe that the promotion of a specified product is essential to compete with the others in order to succeed in the business, provided the actual quality standards of a product are not compromised. To begin with, product advertisement is essential in order to compete and survive in today's intense competition amongst numerous similar products. People have various options to choose an item and they use ads and promotional campaigns to acquire the information about any object. Thus, successful marketing allows introduction of a brand in the market and attract customers. Despite, having an excellent material available in the market for sale, it cannot attract the buyers unless known to them by the advertisements. It is, thus, obvious that it becomes difficult to succeed in achieving successful sale of a product, unless marketed properly. On the other hand, while marketing is essential to improve the productivity of a company, other important factors need not to be compromised. The most important of them is maintaining quality standards of products, as marketing can only introduce products to the customers, but better quality ensures long term survival of a product in the sales market. For example, television brands like Samsung and Sony have survived and dominated the market not by mere promotion, but by maintaining excellent standards of their products as compared to their competitors. Hence, success can not be achieved in business without maintaining standards of a product. In conclusion, marketing promotion plays an important role in running a successful trade, but long term survival of a company requires that the quality is not compromised at any stage.
It
is considered
that promotional campaign to advertise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
market
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essential
to excel in the business. In my opinion, I believe that the promotion of a specified
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essential
to compete with the others in order to succeed in the business, provided the actual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
standards
of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
are not compromised.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
advertisement is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essential
in order to compete and survive in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's intense competition amongst numerous similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
have various options to choose an
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
item and
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
ads and promotional campaigns to acquire the information about any object.
Thus
, successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
introduction of a brand in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
market
and attract customers. Despite, having an excellent material available in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
market
for sale, it cannot attract the buyers unless known to them by the advertisements. It is,
thus
, obvious that it becomes difficult to succeed in achieving successful sale of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
, unless marketed
properly
.

On the other hand
, while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketing
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essential
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the productivity of a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
, other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
factors need not to
be compromised
. The most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
of them is maintaining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
standards
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
, as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketing
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
introduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
to the customers,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
ensures long term survival of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
in the sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
market
.
For example
, television brands like Samsung and Sony have survived and dominated the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
market
not by mere promotion,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
by maintaining excellent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
standards
of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
as compared to their competitors.
Hence
, success can not
be achieved
in business without maintaining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
standards
of a product.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketing
promotion plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in running a successful trade,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
long term survival of a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
requires that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
is not compromised at any stage.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay What do you think is the most important quality of a working environment: good leaders, good colleagues, or flexible time? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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