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What are the advantages when living in a big cities

What are the advantages when living in a big cities OEWo3
Nowadays, the number of people in the rural areas have been moving to the big cities and settled down in this region. There are many beneficial aspects when we live in a big or metropolitan city. In terms of job opportunities, it is easy for employees especially the young or the skilled workers to find good jobs with a lucrative income. The fact that the big cities are advantaged places where attract many domestic and foreign investors so these are extremely potential labor markets for workers to exploit. As the same job and the amount of time spent, employees can earn much higher salaries when compared with those in the rural or mountainous regions. Besides that, the promotion ladder is larger for someone ambitious, experienced, and talented. Various young people have gained certain achievements or higher positions after their efforts and contributions for their work in the open and democratic workplaces in the big cities, which is hard to gain in the narrow-minded workplaces in the rural areas. Moreover, the standard and quality of living in the urban areas are much higher. Residents can easily access modern facilities when living in a big city. For instance, thanks to the advance of the traffic system, moviegoers are likely to watch their favorite blockbuster movie at the cinema within a short distance of traveling, which if they want to enjoy, they have to spend the amount of the time to commute from their hometown to the cities where have cinemas to watch. Absolutely, students in the big cities have more chances to attend schools that have better amenities and access to a better education system. The advanced system education in the regions like the big size cities is usually ideal for students who want to register for higher education. In Vietnam, for example, learners from other nearby regions gather at Ho Chi Minh city to enroll in their dream Universities. In addition to this, the heath care system in the large-scaled cities is far more outstanding. In case of emergency, traveling in short distance to go to a hospital in cities brings benefits for endangered patients. In conclusion, living in crowded and vibrant locations might bring settlers a variety of advantages from job opportunities to standard and quality of living.
Nowadays, the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in the rural areas have been moving to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
and settled down in this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
region
. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
beneficial aspects when we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
or metropolitan city.

In terms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunities, it is easy for employees
especially
the young or the skilled workers to find
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
with a lucrative income. The fact that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are advantaged
places where attract
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
domestic and foreign investors
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
these are
extremely
potential labor markets for workers to exploit. As the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
and the amount of time spent, employees can earn much higher salaries when compared with those in the rural or mountainous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regions
.
Besides
that, the promotion ladder is larger for someone ambitious, experienced, and talented. Various young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have gained certain achievements or higher positions after their efforts and contributions for their work in the open and democratic workplaces in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
, which is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to gain in the narrow-minded workplaces in the rural areas.

Moreover
, the standard and quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in the urban areas are much higher. Residents can
easily
access modern facilities when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
city.
For instance
, thanks to the advance of the traffic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
, moviegoers are likely to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
their favorite blockbuster movie at the cinema within a short distance of traveling, which
Did you mean "is"?
if
they want to enjoy, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend the amount of the time to commute from their hometown to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
where have cinemas to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
.
Absolutely
, students in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
have more chances to attend schools that have better amenities and access to a better education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
. The advanced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
education in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regions
like the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
size
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
is
usually
ideal for students who want to register for higher education. In Vietnam,
for example
, learners from other nearby
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regions
gather at
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
Ho Chi Minh city
to enroll in their dream Universities.
In addition
to this, the heath care
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
in the large-scaled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
is far more outstanding.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
case of emergency, traveling in short distance to go to a hospital in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
brings benefits for endangered patients.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
conclusion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in crowded and vibrant locations might bring settlers a variety of advantages from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunities to standard and quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
.
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IELTS essay What are the advantages when living in a big cities

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
378 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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