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Water is in short supply in many countries of the world, but consumption of water by families is increasing. Why is this happening? What can be done to preserve water

Water is in short supply in many countries of the world, but consumption of water by families is increasing. Why is this happening? What can be done to preserve water PgA8g
Undoubtedly, water is one of the most precious natural resources in the world. Various countries across the globe are dealing with the problem of shortage of water, Moreover, due to the increase of the population many balloons of the water is consumed on the regular bias, thus, it is one of the most frequently discussed problems on the global economic forums. Over population along with the urbanisation made people obligatory to use water everyday. Firstly, due the raise in people in the cites where the daily consumption/usage of the water is mandatory which consequently leads to the heavy utilisation of water. Secondly, with the rainfall level the crisis for water is increased. As a result it limit the water all over the world. Nonetheless, various strategies has to be implemented across the world to conserve the water. First of all, the government has to implement various camping's has to educate people in preserving water. In addition to this, the government has to increase the traffic of the water to individuals resulting in the the unnecessary spillage of water. Furthermore, individuals should be accountable for the usage of water. Considering the shortage of water the recycling of the water should be done with the advance technologies which will be decrease the shortage. To conclude, the water crisis is a grave problem, all countries around the world would need to take collective actions and come up with creative ideas in order to combate this grim situation.
Undoubtedly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
is one of the most precious natural resources in the world. Various countries across the globe are dealing with the problem of shortage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
,
Moreover
, due to the increase of the population
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
balloons of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
is consumed
on the regular bias,
thus
, it is one of the most
frequently
discussed problems on the global economic forums.

Over population along with the
Possible spelling mistake. 'urbanisation' is British English.
urbanisation
made
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
obligatory to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean "every day"?
everyday
.
Firstly
, due the raise in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in the cites where the daily consumption/usage of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
is mandatory which
consequently
leads to the heavy
Possible spelling mistake. 'utilisation' is British English.
utilisation
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
.
Secondly
, with the rainfall level the crisis for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
is increased
.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
a result it
Did you mean "limits"?
limit
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
all over the world.

Nonetheless, various strategies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be implemented
across the world to conserve the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
implement various camping's
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
educate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in preserving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
.
In addition
to this, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
increase the traffic of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
to individuals resulting in
Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only "the" or "the" is left.
the the
unnecessary spillage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
.
Furthermore
, individuals should be accountable for the usage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
. Considering the shortage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
the recycling of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
should
be done
with the advance technologies which will be decrease the shortage.

To conclude
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
crisis is a grave problem, all countries around the world would need to take collective actions and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
up with creative
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
in order to
Possible spelling mistake found.
combate
this grim situation.
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IELTS essay Water is in short supply in many countries of the world, but consumption of water by families is increasing. Why is this happening? What can be done to preserve water

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
244 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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