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ving meals together.why is this happening? Is this positive or negative

ving meals together. why is this happening? Is this positive or negative Da3Ok
It is undeniable fact that families play crucial role in society. A certain section of society asserts that thesedays very less families sit together for eating meals because they follow hectic schedule. It put negative effects on the family since weaken bond in between the parents and children. To commence with, the major argument is hectic schedule. To be precise, most of families are working due to inflative world. There are different timing to go for a work, so they have not time to eat meal together. In India, for instance, majority of parents are working because they want to fulfill their desires. Sometimes there working hours longer and they are not enjoying to meal together. Meanwhile, they prefer to long distance work because of lucrative salary. To make it more clear, meteropolitan cities give more salaries to employ, so people go outside for work. Hence, due to tight schedule people are not eating with each other. There are various negative effects of this development such as weaken bond in family. To make it clear, when people spend lots of time on job the they have not time spend with family and put effect on the relation. To illustrate, in many countries, people for earning to stay alone from family and prefer to eat alone. Besides this, it put deterimental consequence on children’s health. It is believed that if parents are not eat meal together then children prefer to eat outside and it is not healthy food, which raises the health issues. Consequently, it is bane for society. To conclude, undoubtedly, families are part and parcel of life. Although they are not prefer to eat meal with each other because of busy life, yet the negative impacts cannot denied. It may be put adverse effect on upcoming generations.
It is undeniable fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
play crucial role in society. A certain section of society asserts that
Possible spelling mistake found.
thesedays
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun families is countable.
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
sit together for eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they follow hectic schedule. It
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put
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
since weaken bond in between the parents and children. To commence with, the major argument is hectic schedule. To be precise, most of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
are working due to
Possible spelling mistake found.
inflative
world. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
timing to go for a work,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they have not time to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meal
together. In India,
for instance
,
It seems that an article is missing.
majority of
parents are working
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they want to fulfill their desires.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
there working hours
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
longer and
they are not enjoying to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meal
together. Meanwhile, they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prefer
to long distance work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of lucrative salary. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
meteropolitan
cities give more salaries to employ,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
go outside for work.
Hence
, due to tight schedule
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not eating with each other. There are various
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects of this development such as weaken bond in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
, when
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people
spend lots of time on job
Possible typo. Did you mean "the" or "they"?
the they
have not time spend with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
put
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
on the relation. To illustrate, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries,
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people
for earning to stay alone from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prefer
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
alone.
Besides
this, it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
put
Possible spelling mistake found.
deterimental
consequence on children’s health. It
is believed
that if parents are not
Consider using a past participle here: "eaten".
eat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meal
together then children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prefer
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
outside and it is not healthy food, which raises the health issues.
Consequently
, it is bane for society.
To conclude
,
undoubtedly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
are part and parcel of life. Although they are not
Consider using a past participle here: "preferred".
prefer
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meal
with each other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of busy life,
yet
the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts cannot
The verb 'cannot' requires the base form of the verb: "deny"
denied
. It may be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
put
adverse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
on upcoming generations.
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IELTS essay ving meals together. why is this happening? Is this positive or negative

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
298 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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