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Vaccinating children against preventable diseases is not only unnecessary but also dangerous. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.7

Vaccinating children against preventable diseases is not only unnecessary but also dangerous. v. 7
Vaccinations are becoming increasingly unpopular with respect to their use in preventing diseases particularly in children. In addition, these people believe that vaccines are not required and have adverse effects on physical health. This essay will examine the effects of immunisations and focus on understanding the necessity of these vaccines during one’s formative years. In recent years vaccinating has been strongly related to reducing immunity in children. Additionally, it hampers body’s antibody production, which can prove to be fatal when faced with a serious threat. For example, extremely high doses of vaccines can have a hampering effect on one’s total leukocyte count since the body develops drug dependence. Therefore, it is believed that vaccinating kids can pose serious threats to their health. Developing countries witness a plethora of diseases, especially in children, vaccines have played an imperative role in preventing epidemics despite few allergic reactions. Furthermore, these injections lead to reduction in overall mortality in children, they seem to be imperative provided that they are given in moderation. For instance, in India a drive against polio led to complete eradication of the disease, which once posed a serious threat. Thus, vaccination is an important building block in helping a nation fight against diseases which can be easily prevented. To conclude, some people believe that vaccination is dangerous for kids despite the potential benefits, whereas others believe it is an essential need in today’s time particularly as the world is faced with various health threats. I strongly agree that it is necessary for kids to be given immunisations periodically provided that they are administered in moderation and not abused.
Vaccinations are becoming
increasingly
unpopular with respect to their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
in preventing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
particularly
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
In addition
, these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vaccines
are not required and have adverse effects on physical health. This essay will examine the effects of
Possible spelling mistake. 'immunisations' is British English.
immunisations
and focus on understanding the necessity of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vaccines
during one’s formative years.

In recent years vaccinating has been
strongly
related to reducing immunity in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Additionally
, it hampers body’s antibody production, which can prove to be fatal when faced with a serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
threat
.
For example
,
extremely
high doses of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vaccines
can have a hampering effect on one’s total leukocyte count since the body develops drug dependence.
Therefore
, it
is believed
that vaccinating kids can pose serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
threats
to their health.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Developing countries
witness a plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
,
especially
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vaccines
have played an imperative role in preventing epidemics despite few allergic reactions.
Furthermore
, these injections lead to reduction in
overall
mortality in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, they seem to be imperative provided that they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
in moderation.
For instance
, in India a drive against polio led to complete eradication of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
, which once posed a serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
threat
.
Thus
, vaccination is an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
building block in helping a nation fight against
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
which can be
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevented
.

To conclude
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that vaccination is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
for kids despite the potential benefits, whereas others believe it is an essential need in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s time
particularly
as the world
is faced
with various health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
threats
. I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that it is necessary for kids to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
Possible spelling mistake. 'immunisations' is British English.
immunisations
periodically
provided that they
are administered
in moderation and not abused.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Vaccinating children against preventable diseases is not only unnecessary but also dangerous. v. 7

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
268 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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