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Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on people. v. 3

Certain people hold the opinion that the daily use of computers results in more detrimental than advantageous effects. Even though I agree with the statement that computers cause damaging effects on health, the positives still outweigh the harmful outcomes. Computers are extremely useful in our daily life because it is a convenient and accessible way of working. These days, computers are light-weight so they can be carried around easily. Due to its many functions, many people own this device. For instance, computers can be used for work and recreational purposes, such as gaming and a form of television, which is useful to those young and old. In addition, almost all households own computers as they are able to perform a myriad of functions. For this reason, laptops and computers are beneficial to our lives. However, long-term usage of these electronics can be harmful to our health. For example, office workers are more likely to develop short-sightedness and carpal tunnel syndrome. Some people are addicted to gaming which means they sit staring at a computer for hours. For this reason, using computers for long periods of time promotes a sedentary lifestyle which, in turn, is also harmful to our well-being. Therefore, for these reasons, using computers has a negative effect on our life. In conclusion, while electronics have certain negative results on our health, this is not outweighed by the countless advantages. Using this device should be used in moderation to try to limit the harmful effects. Having said this, I completely disagree with the statement that computers have more negative than positive effects.

IELTS essay Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on people. Do you agree or disagree? v.3

Certain
people
hold the opinion that the daily
use
of computers results in more detrimental than advantageous effects.
Even though
I
agree
with the statement that computers cause damaging effects on health, the positives
still
outweigh the harmful outcomes. Computers are
extremely
useful in our daily life
because
it is a convenient and accessible way of working. These days, computers are light-weight
so
they can
be carried
around
easily
. Due to its
many
functions,
many
people
own
this device.
For instance
, computers can be
used
for work and recreational purposes, such as gaming and a form of television, which is useful to those young and
old
.
In addition
, almost all households
own
computers as they are able to perform a myriad of functions.
For this reason
, laptops and computers are beneficial to our
lives
.
However
, long-term usage of these electronics can be harmful to our health.
For example
, office workers are more likely to develop
short-sightedness
and carpal tunnel syndrome.
Some
people
are addicted
to gaming which means they sit staring at a computer for hours.
For this reason
, using computers for long periods of time promotes a sedentary lifestyle which, in turn, is
also
harmful to our well-being.
Therefore
, for these reasons, using computers has a
negative
effect on our life.
In conclusion
, while electronics have certain
negative
results on our health, this is not outweighed by the countless advantages. Using this device should be
used
in moderation to try to limit the harmful effects. Having said this, I completely disagree with the statement that computers have more
negative
than
positive
effects.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
40Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
4 paragraphs
263 words
9
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resources: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Band score ≥ 7
  • Band score ≤ 6
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