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Unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programs (for example, working for a charity, improving the neighborhood, or teaching sports to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.3

Unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programs (for example, working for a charity, improving the neighborhood, or teaching sports to younger children). v. 3
Compulsory programs is undoubtedly the most important part for students in terms of the academic fields. It usually encompasses the professional subjects and internship or practice for students who engage in health professionals. However, it is often argued that the unpaid community service should be obligatory course for high school students. In my view, I completely agree with that. It is fundamental for the students to participate in charitary service in the community owing to the fact that every individual should contribute to the society in order to feedback the community. If students involve in philanthropic service, they could fulfill the social responsibilities. To demonstrate, people who live an affluent life or earn satisfactory salary treatment often commit themselves to charitary service in order to repay and feedback to the community. This would not only contribute to the entire society, but also achieve their social responsibilities. Hence, engaging in benovelent service is necessary. Apart from the reason as mentioned above, it is vitally important for the students to acquire how to give support or provide aid to people in need. This could not only reflect their value of helping underprivileged people, but also accumulate the treasured experience. A case in point is that certain students participate in special institution where accomodates people with disabilities after school or during the summer and winter vacation. The students give assistance to people who suffered from visual and auditory impairment by supporting their daily activities and instructing them simple skills for living. By way of conclusion, I reiterate my opinion that it is of paramount importance that the charitary service should be compulsory for high school students as it is conducive to both society and students.
Compulsory programs is
undoubtedly
the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in terms of the academic fields. It
usually
encompasses the professional subjects and internship or practice for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who engage in health professionals.
However
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argued that the unpaid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
should be obligatory course for high school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. In my view, I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with that.

It is fundamental for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to participate in
Possible spelling mistake found.
charitary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
owing to the fact that every individual should contribute to the society in order to feedback the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
involve in philanthropic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
, they could fulfill the social responsibilities. To demonstrate,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
an affluent life or earn satisfactory salary treatment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
commit themselves to
Possible spelling mistake found.
charitary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
in order to repay and feedback to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
. This would not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
contribute to the entire society,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
achieve their social responsibilities.
Hence
, engaging in
Possible spelling mistake found.
benovelent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
is necessary.

Apart from the reason as mentioned above, it is
vitally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to acquire how to give support or provide aid to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in need. This could not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
reflect their value of helping underprivileged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
accumulate the treasured experience. A case in point is that certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
participate in special institution where
Possible spelling mistake found.
accomodates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with disabilities after school or during the summer and winter vacation. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
give assistance to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who suffered from visual and auditory impairment by supporting their daily activities and instructing them simple
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
for living.

By way of conclusion, I reiterate my opinion that it is of paramount importance that the
Possible spelling mistake found.
charitary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
should be compulsory for high school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
as it is conducive to both society and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
25Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay Unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programs (for example, working for a charity, improving the neighborhood, or teaching sports to younger children). v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
282 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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