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University Personal Statemet

University Personal Statemet 6KGGB
I am Ali S. AlSalaim. I was born and grew up in Najran city in the southern area of Saudi Arabia. After completing, my high school, I joined the Architectural Engineering department at Najran university and graduated in 2020. I engaged in my first job at SASROCK as Project Support Engineer since Jan 2021 to present. During my experience, I learned many things starting from meeting colleagues from more than 15 nationalities and knowing about their cultures and languages that enhanced my communication and teamwork skills as well as insight into the business in general. During my bachelor’s degree I was interested in the engineering economics, project management and physics. After I took those subjects, I realized my passion to learn more about them. However, in my work experience as Project Support Engineer I have tried the practical side of my passions and working with professionals which inspired me to improve my skills in management and business processes. And I decided to study a master’s program in related subjects. One of my colleagues holds a master’s degree in Engineering Management from Coventry University in the UK. He advised me to study in the UK to live the experience of studying in the most prestigious academic destinations and met students from all over the world. Throughout my search, the master's in management in University of Edinburgh caught my eyes, especially the flexibility in the optional modules which will help a lot to customize my studying as much as I need. Such a degree from world ranked university will improve my career and change my life by learning new knowledge that could lead me to distinguish in the market or even my own business. Thank you for considering my application.
I am Ali S.
Possible spelling mistake found.
AlSalaim
. I
was born
and grew up in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Najran
city in the southern area of Saudi Arabia. After completing, my high school, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
joined
the Architectural Engineering department at
Possible spelling mistake found.
Najran
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
and graduated in 2020.

I engaged in my
first
job at
Possible spelling mistake found.
SASROCK
as Project Support Engineer since Jan 2021 to present. During my experience, I learned
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things starting from meeting colleagues from more than 15 nationalities and knowing about their cultures and languages that enhanced my communication and teamwork
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
as well
as insight into the business
in general
.

During my bachelor’s degree I
was interested
in the engineering economics, project
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
management
and physics. After I took those subjects, I realized my passion to learn more about them.

However
, in my work experience as Project Support Engineer I have tried the practical side of my passions and working with professionals which inspired me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
management
and business processes. And I decided to study a master’s program in related subjects. One of my colleagues holds a master’s degree in Engineering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Management
from Coventry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
in the UK. He advised me to study in the UK to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
the experience of studying in the most prestigious academic destinations and met students from all over the world.

Throughout my search, the master's in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
management
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
of Edinburgh caught my eyes,
especially
the flexibility in the optional modules which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
a lot to customize my studying as much as I need. Such a degree from world ranked
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
my career and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
my life by learning new knowledge that could lead me to distinguish in the market or even my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
business.

Thank you for considering my application.
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IELTS essay University Personal Statemet

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
288 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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