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Unemployment is increasingly getting serious in most countries. Some people think pupils should be only offered primary education while others believe that secondary education is necessary. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Unemployment is increasingly getting serious in most countries. Some people think pupils should be only offered primary education while others believe that secondary education is necessary. kYW8W
Education is a basic human right which every child should be given opportunity to access regardless of their socio-economic status or country of origin. Limiting children to certain level of education based upon their background has been generating a lot of controversial arguments lately. While some people argue that pupils from low income nations should not be allowed to further their studies up to the secondary level, others are of the opinion that their status should not be used as a yardstick to deny these children of this basic right. I totally disagree with the view that children should be denied of such an opportunity. Firstly, children are the future of a nation, it is the quality of education that they receive today that would predict the growth of the country in few years to come. The reason is not far fetched, many people who have become professionals came to be as a result of the advanced level of education they received. For instance, sciences which are thought in school forms the basis for technological know hows and innovations which we use in modern day to day activities to make life easier and better for us. In addition, secondary education is a stepping stone for tertiary levels. A pupil who has passed through both processes can become an entrepreneur in future and create massive job opportunities for others, thereby solving the problem of unemployment in their country. An example of this can be found in people that are working for themselves or even working remotely and offering services to people at a cost. To sum it up, I believe it is totally wrong and biased to deny children the right to advance in their career as such could kill potential talents.
Education
is a basic human right which every child should be
given
opportunity to access regardless of their
socio-economic
status or country of origin. Limiting
children
to certain
level
of
education
based upon their background has been generating
a lot of
controversial arguments lately. While
some
people
argue that pupils from low income nations should not be
allowed
to
further
their studies up to the secondary
level
, others are of the opinion that their status should not be
used
as a yardstick to deny these
children
of this basic right. I
totally
disagree with the view that
children
should
be denied
of such an opportunity.

Firstly
,
children
are the future of a nation, it is the quality of
education
that they receive
today
that would predict the growth of the country in few years to
come
. The reason is not
far fetched
,
many
people
who have become professionals came to be
as a result
of the advanced
level
of
education
they received.
For instance
, sciences which are
thought
in school forms the basis for technological know
hows
and innovations which we
use
in modern
day to day
activities to
make
life easier and better for us.

In addition
, secondary
education
is a stepping stone for tertiary
levels
. A pupil who has passed through both processes can become an entrepreneur in future and create massive job opportunities for others, thereby solving the problem of unemployment in their country. An example of this can
be found
in
people
that are working for themselves or even working
remotely
and offering services to
people
at a cost.

To sum it up, I believe it is
totally
wrong
and biased to deny
children
the right to advance in their career as such could kill potential talents.
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IELTS essay Unemployment is increasingly getting serious in most countries. Some people think pupils should be only offered primary education while others believe that secondary education is necessary.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
291 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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