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trip where you learn something new

trip where you learn something new 3bdnd
I started participating in our school's joint program with other schools about developing leadership abilities around seven years ago. The program, known as the suburban camping trip, lasted two days and one night. I'm not sure about other schools, but I remember being amused at first by the unusual vehicles we were going to use; it appeared to be a tiny truck despite having a lounge seat at the back end for passengers. Traveling in such an unusual method of transportation drew the attention of other vehicles, but instead of being ashamed, we laughed the entire way to the destination. When we get at our location, we divide into groups to participate in the activities, and each of us will take on the role of leader to guide the group. I learn about leadership as a result of all of the processes. It was not just about being a good instructor, but also about being a good listener who could drop their ego in order to make the right decision. At the end of the day, the assignment we worked on came in second place out of six groups, and we couldn't be happier. Even now, the skills I learned from that help me a lot, and I'm grateful to have been a part of the trip.
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
participating in our school's joint program with other schools about developing leadership abilities around seven years ago. The program, known as the suburban camping trip, lasted two days and one night. I'm not sure about other schools,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I remember
being amused
at
first
by the unusual vehicles we were going to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
; it appeared to be a tiny truck despite having a lounge seat at the back
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
for passengers. Traveling in such an unusual method of transportation drew the attention of other vehicles,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
instead
of
being ashamed
, we laughed the entire way to the destination.

When we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
at our location, we divide into groups to participate in the activities, and each of us will take on the role of leader to guide the group. I learn about leadership
as a result
of
Consider using "all the".
all of the
processes. It was not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
about being a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
instructor,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
about being a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
listener who could drop their ego in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the right decision. At the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the day, the assignment we worked on came in second place out of six groups, and we couldn't be happier. Even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
I learned from that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
me a lot, and I'm grateful to have been a part of the trip.
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IELTS essay trip where you learn something new

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
217 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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