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Travel from and to work is becoming more difficult. One solution is that employers should allow employees to work at home. Do you agree that the advantages and more than disadvantages?

Travel from and to work is becoming more difficult. One solution is that employers should allow employees to work at home. Do you agree that the advantages and more than disadvantages? XG16r
Working from home is much popular in today’s modern world. Many people claim that it is more comfortable to do office works from residence. Organization must approve work from home for their staff rather than daily up and down from workplace place which is more troubling. This trend of home working has more benefits then its demerits. Reasons related to it are elucidated in below paragraphs. Firstly, doing work from house is beneficial to family responsible employee as no transit time is wasted in it. Consequently, they can enjoy work along with family. For example, a person can perform work and handle their aged parents also. Moreover, it save travel expenses. On the contrary, working from home diverts concentration in job numerous times. Office environments are missing so it is hard to do given task in targeted timing. For instance, while doing work there is high chances of mind diversion like watching TV or playing with children and much more. Furthermore, huge possibility to get reckless and it result in losing job also. In my opinion, working from residence have plethora of advantages. Number of other works also can be done simultaneously to earn extra money. However, one can work with fully freedom and without any restriction at their house. To illustrate, my brother carry out his own business along with job while working at home. In conclusion, working from home should be allowed by number of companies for the financial growth of employees and company by spending less expense on place and facilities in office. Government should produce some SOP for the better future.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Working
from home is much popular in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s modern world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
claim that it is more comfortable to do office works from residence. Organization
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
approve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from home for their staff
rather
than daily up and down from workplace place which is more troubling. This trend of home
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
has more benefits
Did you mean "than"?
then
its demerits. Reasons related to it
are elucidated
in below paragraphs.

Firstly
, doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
is beneficial to family responsible employee as no transit time
is wasted
in it.
Consequently
, they can enjoy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
along with family.
For example
, a person can perform
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and handle their aged parents
also
.
Moreover
, it
Did you mean "saves"?
save
travel expenses.

On the contrary
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
from home diverts concentration in job numerous times. Office environments are missing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to do
After the auxiliary verb 'do', use the base form of a verb. Did you mean "give"?
given
task in targeted timing.
For instance
, while doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
there is high chances of mind diversion like watching TV or playing with children and much more.
Furthermore
, huge possibility to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
reckless and it
Did you mean "results"?
result
in losing job
also
.

In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
from residence have plethora of advantages. Number of other works
also
can
be done
simultaneously
to earn extra money.
However
, one can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
with
fully
freedom and without any restriction at their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
. To illustrate, my brother carry out his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
business along with job while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
at home.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
from home should be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
by number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
for the financial growth of employees and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
by spending less expense on place and facilities in office.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
should produce
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
SOP for the better future.
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IELTS essay Travel from and to work is becoming more difficult. One solution is that employers should allow employees to work at home. Do you agree that the advantages and more than disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
265 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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