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Traffic increases pollution. Pollution increases health issues. Give arguments that increasing fuel prices is better solution for this or not and give your solutions/suggestions.

Traffic, pollution and health are progressively linked to each other. While overpriced petrol rates have decreased traffic and thus pollution, the rise in health problems has not halted. The main issues arising are cardiovascular and respiratory. While there are many possible solutions, increasing fuel prices is far and away the least efficient of them. To begin with, increased gasoline prices especially in underdeveloped countries is only putting more pressure on the individuals and the economy. Even though some people start using public transport instead of personal conveyance which decreases pollution in theory, the majority of population remains unaffected. On the contrary, the health issues like hypertension remain unresolved as it is also directly related to the stress put on people due to expensive fuel. It is evident from an American survey which shows little to no improvement in the percentage of hypertensive individuals after employing such technique. Similarly, respiratory problems like asthma, COPD, allergy and bronchogenic carcinoma are undoubtedly exacerbated owing to increased quantity of pollutants shoved into the atmosphere. On paper, increased prices should decrease traffic and pollution, and consequently such airway abnormalities but statistics say otherwise. A research was done to show that there was insignificant improvement in overall respiratory disorders even after doubling the fuel cost per liter over 2 years. The solutions to these problems require changes at national scale. Firstly, pollution can be decreased with promotion of electric cars as this has no contradictory effect on health. Secondly, public transport quality should be improved to make people choose public transport over personal conveyance. Their ticket prices should also be kept in check. Lastly, old cars that are overused should be kept out of the system as they produce relatively more toxic substances. All these solutions are one time investments with long lasting effects that are necessary to stop further problems from developing.
Traffic,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
are
progressively
linked to each other. While overpriced petrol rates have decreased traffic and
thus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
, the rise in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
has not halted. The main issues arising are cardiovascular and respiratory. While there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
possible solutions, increasing fuel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
is far and away the least efficient of them.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, increased gasoline
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
especially
in underdeveloped countries is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
putting more pressure on the individuals and the economy.
Even though
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
using public transport
instead
of personal conveyance which decreases
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
in theory, the majority of population remains unaffected.
On the contrary
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
issues like hypertension remain unresolved as it is
also
directly
related to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
put on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
due to expensive fuel. It is evident from an American survey which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
to no improvement in the percentage of hypertensive individuals after employing such technique.

Similarly
, respiratory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
like asthma, COPD, allergy and bronchogenic carcinoma are
undoubtedly
exacerbated owing to increased quantity of pollutants shoved into the atmosphere. On paper, increased
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
should decrease traffic and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
, and
consequently
such airway abnormalities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
statistics say
otherwise
. A research
was done
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that there was insignificant improvement in
overall
respiratory disorders even after doubling the fuel cost per liter over 2 years.

The solutions to these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
require
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
at national scale.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
can
be decreased
with promotion of electric cars as this has no contradictory effect on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
Secondly
, public transport quality should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
choose public transport over personal conveyance. Their ticket
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
should
also
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
.
Lastly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
cars that
are overused
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
out of the system as they produce
relatively
more toxic substances. All these solutions are one time investments with long lasting effects that are necessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
further
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
from developing.
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IELTS essay Traffic increases pollution. Pollution increases health issues. Give arguments that increasing fuel prices is better solution for this or not and give your solutions/suggestions.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
307 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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