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There are many different types of music in the world. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of any country more important than the international music?

There are over one thousand genres of music currently enjoyed by different nations according to their tradition. Music in any form is a fuel for the soul, provided that the one hearing it understands it. While international music might appeal to many people, the folk songs are the core of country's cultural existence and integrity. In this essay, I shall discuss the compulsion of music in this world as well as the importance of traditional music over the international one. To begin with, music has always been thought of the language of feeling and of passion and their lyrics the language of reason. So it can produce calmness or rage or sadness or happiness that goes well beyond words. Music helps create emotional condition for soul expansion - it makes you calm, happy and serene. Therefore, it has been recognized as a form of therapy because it affects certain emotional centers in the brain. For example, if you listen to Beethoven and Mozart, the notion that music can hypnotize an individual and control his spirit will be clearly evident. Hence these traditional musical masterpieces are still alive even after centuries of time passage. Furthermore, the traditional music always holds higher ground in the minds of native people. For locals, the traditional music is easier to understand and flows with the natural rhythm of their spirit and emotion. This is mainly due to it being produced by the artists who better comprehend the emotional state of their fellow men and then put it into sounds that are in harmony with the recipients. On the other hand, even though international music undoubtedly has better quality and explains prospects in a general fashion; it is the euphony and understanding of the folk music that most people are after. In the end, music is an irresistible obligation that is necessary for the growth of mental health - hence called the food for the soul. And no other music does it better than the traditional music made particularly by and for the native-born.
There are over one thousand genres of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
currently
enjoyed by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
nations according to their tradition.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Music
in any form is a fuel for the soul, provided that the one hearing it understands it. While international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
might appeal to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, the folk songs are the core of country's cultural existence and integrity. In this essay, I shall discuss the compulsion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
in this world
as well
as the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
over the international one.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
has always been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
of the language of feeling and of passion and their lyrics the language of reason.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
it can produce calmness or rage or sadness or happiness that goes well beyond words.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Music
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
create emotional condition for soul expansion - it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
you calm, happy and serene.
Therefore
, it has
been recognized
as a form of therapy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it affects certain emotional centers in the brain.
For example
, if you listen to Beethoven and Mozart, the notion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
can hypnotize an individual and control his spirit will be
clearly
evident.
Hence
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
musical masterpieces are
still
alive even after centuries of time passage.

Furthermore
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
always holds higher ground in the minds of native
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. For locals, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is easier to understand and flows with the natural rhythm of their spirit and emotion. This is
mainly
due to it
being produced
by the artists who better comprehend the emotional state of their fellow
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
and then put it into sounds that are in harmony with the recipients.
On the other hand
,
even though
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
undoubtedly
has better quality and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
prospects in a general fashion; it is the euphony and understanding of the folk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
that most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are after.

In the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is an irresistible obligation
that is
necessary for the growth of mental health -
hence
called the food for the soul. And no other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
does it better than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
made
particularly
by and for the native-born.
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IELTS essay There are many different types of music in the world. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of any country more important than the international music?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
338 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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