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TPO29 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement To improve the quality of education universities should spend more money on salaries for university professors v.1

TPO29 To improve the quality of education universities should spend more money on salaries for university professors v. 1
In today' s progressive world, no one can turn a blind eye to the significant effects of education in our life. Some people argues that to improve the quality of education, universities should spend more money on professor' s salaries. On the other extreme of the rope, other hold the opposite opinion. Although both sides take their own positions, personally speaking, I firmly believe that the first group carries more weight. In the following paragraph, I will explain my reasons to justify my points of view. As the first and paramount reason, a good payment for professors will increase the access of books and academic courses for them. To be more specific, with more money professors will get more academic knowledge, ideas and concepts. Hence, they will be exposure to different horizons and it will help them to learn skills to improve the quality of the education. Take the Japan' s education as an example. Nowadays, Japan has one of the best ranking education of the world due the fact of access of technologies and a good salaries. So, if Japan had not provided for professor a great payment, nor could they get a excellent quality education neither could they have access of academic tools. The second reason coming to my mind to substantiate my viewpoint is that a good amount of money for professors will relive their financial worries. In other words, they will have more time to spend in classes and research than think in their economic problems. As a result, they will increase the quality of education. For instance, a data analyze conducted by some master scientists shows that professors who do not have financial worries improved the quality of education in their university three times more than the professors who have economic problems. This specific argument points out the importance of a great financial life. In conclusion, take the above reasons into account, I strongly believe that more cash in professor' s salaries will increase the quality of education, not only for the access of academic tools that it can provide, but also for the relieve of their financial stress.
In
Possible spelling mistake found.
today&
#039; s progressive world, no one can turn a blind eye to the significant effects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
in our life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
argues
that to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, universities should spend more money on
Possible spelling mistake found.
professor&
#039; s salaries. On the other extreme of the rope, other hold the opposite opinion. Although both sides take their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
positions,
personally
speaking, I
firmly
believe that the
first
group carries more weight. In the following paragraph, I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
to justify my points of view.

As the
first
and paramount
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
, a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
payment for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
will increase the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
of books and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
courses for them. To be more specific, with more money
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
knowledge,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
and concepts.
Hence
, they will be exposure to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
horizons and it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to learn
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. Take the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Japan&
#039; s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
as an example. Nowadays, Japan has one of the best ranking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
of the world due the fact of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
of technologies and a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "salary"?
salaries
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, if Japan had not provided for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professor
a great payment, nor could they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
excellent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
neither could they have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
tools.

The second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
coming to my mind to substantiate my viewpoint is that a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
amount of money for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
will relive their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
worries.
In other words
, they will have more time to spend in classes and research than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
in their economic problems.
As a result
, they will increase the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
For instance
, a data analyze conducted by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
master scientists
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
who do not have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
worries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
in their university three times more than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
who have economic problems. This specific argument points out the importance of a great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
life.

In conclusion
, take the above
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
into account, I
strongly
believe that more cash in
Possible spelling mistake found.
professor&
#039; s salaries will increase the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
tools that it can provide,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
for the
The word 'relieve' is not a noun. Did you mean "relief"?
relieve
of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
39Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
A special kind of beauty exists which is born in language, of language, and for language.
Gaston Bachelard

IELTS essay TPO29 To improve the quality of education universities should spend more money on salaries for university professors v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
354 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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