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TPO18-marketing strategiesUsing points and examples from the lecture, explain how the characteristics of target customers influence marketing strategy for products. v.1

TPO18-marketing strategiesUsing points and examples from the lecture, explain how the characteristics of target customers influence marketing strategy for products. v. 1
It is argued that vegetarian people do not like to eat meat or seafood because they consider this unhealthy and advantageous for wildlife. This essay will explain both the statements as well as provide my point of view about this interesting topic. Many vegetarian people assumed that eating meat or fish is harmful for their self-fitness. I partly agree with this view because meat contains proteins and fish has omega fats, which is a vital need of the human body for the proper functioning of body cells. For instance, Proteins and omega fats regulate body processes, transport materials throughout our body, help our immune system and act as a source of energy. Despite all these benefits, we cannot deny the fact that meats also consist of saturated fats, which results in detrimental health problems, such as cardiovascular disease and cholesterol. However, I agree with the second point that many non-vegetarian have opted for a vegan diet since numerous animals were being killed to source their body meat. Because of this, animal and sea creature’s population have reduced dramatically, affecting our natural habitat. A research of World Health Organization report in 2015, over 70% of animals were killed in Africa, to fulfill meat appetite of only 30% of the local population. In conclusion, some people indeed believe that being a vegan is healthier than a meat consumer, and further impose a positive effect on the environment. To a certain point, I would agree with it, but meats and fish also contain certain types of nutrition that are needed by our body. I do believe that if we could balance the consumption of meat, fish and vegetable, it would make our body become healthier than the vegetarian.
It
is argued
that vegetarian
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
do not like to eat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
or seafood
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they consider this unhealthy and advantageous for wildlife. This essay will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
both the statements
Probable usage error. Use "and" after 'both'.
as well as
provide my point of view about this interesting topic.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
vegetarian
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
assumed that eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
or fish is harmful for their self-fitness. I partly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this view
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
contains proteins and fish has omega fats, which is a vital need of the human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
for the proper functioning of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
cells.
For instance
, Proteins and omega fats regulate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
processes, transport materials throughout our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
our immune system and act as a source of energy. Despite all these benefits, we cannot deny the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meats
also
consist of saturated fats, which results in detrimental health problems, such as cardiovascular disease and cholesterol.

However
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the second point that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
non-vegetarian have opted for a vegan diet since numerous animals were
being killed
to source their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
.
Because of this
, animal and sea creature’s population have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
dramatically
, affecting our natural habitat.
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "research".
A research
of World Health Organization report in 2015, over 70% of animals
were killed
in Africa, to fulfill
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
appetite of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
30% of the local population.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
indeed
believe that being a vegan is healthier than a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
consumer, and
further
impose a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effect on the environment. To a certain point, I would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with it,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meats
and fish
also
contain certain types of nutrition that
are needed
by our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
. I do believe that if we could balance the consumption of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
, fish and vegetable, it would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
become healthier than the vegetarian.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO18-marketing strategiesUsing points and examples from the lecture, explain how the characteristics of target customers influence marketing strategy for products. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
285 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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