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TPO 48 Writing IndependentDo you agree or disagree with the following statement? Because modern life is very complex, it is essential for young people to have the ability to plan and organize. v.2

TPO 48 Writing Independent Because modern life is very complex, it is essential for young people to have the ability to plan and organize. v. 2
Without a shadow of doubt, every individual should have certain characteristics in order to be able to cope with the difficulties and necessary issues of life. Such attributes are even of more importance in the modern era where the complexity of life is more. In this regard, young people, as future members of society, should learn certain features to be successful in their future lives. The controversial question which arises here is whether it is essential for young people to have the ability to plan and organize or they should focus to learn other qualities. From my vantage point, management is an indispensable quality for every individual and young people should do their best to learn this trait. In what follows, the most significant reasons will be illustrated. The first aspect to point out is that modern life includes several aspects each of which requires time and concentration. A person' s life consists of school or work, spending time with family and friends, daily activities and so on. If the person does not have a specific schedule, that would cause him not to devote adequate time and effort for each task. As a result, he may overlook certain aspects. For instance, one of my friends used to spend a lot of time at work. Therefore, he did not have much time to spend with his families and friends. Even, he would not do not any of his household chores and his house was always messy. One day, he changed his mind and tried to make plans for his life and organize everything. That brought about positive consequences for him since not only was he able to accomplish his duties at work, but also he could spend time with his friends and do his daily activities the way he must have. Furthermore, being organized would cause the person to prosper in his life as well as his career. As a worker, he devotes certain time to each task and therefore he would accomplish all his responsibilities. Consequently, his customers and employers would feel satisfied and his status would thrive. Moreover, having plans for everything would cause the person to be more delightful since he is able to devote part of his time to the activities he always wished to do. For instance, one of my friends is really organized. Not only is she a good student at the university, but also she is a professional swimmer and pianist. These are all the things that she loves and through management, she is able to do all of them perfectly. Therefore, her success in every field has brought her happiness and hope. To recapitulate, all aforementioned reasons lead us to the fact that an essential ability for the young generation is the ability to manage and plan. Although other characteristics are also important for young people to have such as sociability, management is more helpful since it allows them to overcome the sophistication of modern are by doing all their stuff and plans. Moreover, it would bring them success and joy.
Without a shadow of doubt, every individual should have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
characteristics in order to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
able
to cope with the difficulties and necessary issues of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. Such attributes are even of more importance in the modern era where the complexity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is more. In this regard,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, as future members of society, should learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
features to be successful in their future
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. The controversial question which arises here is whether it is essential for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to have the ability to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plan
and
Use a comma before 'or' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
organize or
they should focus to learn other qualities. From my vantage point, management is an indispensable quality for every individual and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should do their best to learn this trait. In what follows, the most significant reasons will
be illustrated
.

The
first
aspect to point out is that modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
includes several aspects each of which requires
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and concentration. A
Possible spelling mistake found.
person&
#039; s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
consists of school or work, spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with family and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
, daily activities and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. If the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
does not have a specific schedule, that would cause him not to devote adequate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and effort for each task.
As a result
, he may overlook
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
aspects.
For instance
, one of my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
at work.
Therefore
, he did not have much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to spend with his families and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
. Even, he would
Double negatives are discouraged in standard English. Can you reformulate this phrase or is a comma missing?
not do not
any of his household chores and his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
was always messy. One day, he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
his mind and tried to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plans
for his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and organize everything. That brought about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
consequences for him since not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
was he
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
able
to accomplish his duties at work,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
he could spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
and do his daily activities the way he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
have.

Furthermore
,
being organized
would cause the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
to prosper in his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
as well
as his career. As a worker, he devotes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to each task and
therefore
he would accomplish all his responsibilities.
Consequently
, his customers and employers would feel satisfied and his status would thrive.
Moreover
, having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plans
for everything would cause the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
to be more delightful since he is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
able
to devote part of his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to the activities he always wished to do.
For instance
, one of my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
is
really
organized. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
is she a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
student at the university,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
she is a professional swimmer and pianist. These are all the things that she
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loves
and through management, she is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
able
to do all of them
perfectly
.
Therefore
, her success in every field has brought her happiness and hope.

To recapitulate, all aforementioned reasons lead us to the fact that an essential ability for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
generation is the ability to manage and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plan
. Although other characteristics are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to have such as sociability, management is more helpful since it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
them to overcome the sophistication of modern are by doing all their stuff and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plans
.
Moreover
, it would bring them success and joy.
20Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
45Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
A different language is a different vision of life.
Federico Fellini

IELTS essay TPO 48 Writing Independent Because modern life is very complex, it is essential for young people to have the ability to plan and organize. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
508 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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