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TPO-38 task 1Your friend is thinking about getting a pet and asks for your advice. What kind of pet would you recommend for your friend? Explain the reasons for your recommendation. v.1

TPO-38 task 1Your friend is thinking about getting a pet and asks for your advice. What kind of pet would you recommend for your friend? Explain the reasons for your recommendation. v. 1
Recently, people now prefer to work for themselves rather than being employed in an enterprise or factory. This essay will discuss the reason why people might choose to be self-employed, and state the demerits of this latest development. The reason for this recent trend is that schedules are more flexible when people earn a living without working for others. In other words, people can easily determine their resumption and closing hours without any consquences. That is, they are able to plan, resechedule, and cancel engagements at their personal terms and conditions that suit their current plans. For example, a local bottling company in Lagos reported that there was an upsurge in the number of people that resigned in 2018 because of the company's rigid work hours. Thus, many people are drifting to the path of personal paying jobs, which they self determines how it runs. However, there are many disadvantages to working independently. Firstly, the risk of the business is borne solely by the individual owner. This is because the company is managed by just one person who is responsible for all the profits and losses of the business. Therefore, the danger of a one man business is high as all problems associated with the investment is managed alone. For instance, many personally owned food businesses collapsed as a result of the rise in inflation rate in 2018. In addition, the chances of mismanaging and misappropriating funds becomes more possible because an individual is in charge of all financial dealings. This affects the general growth and development of a craft as there will be no checks and balances. In conclusion, these days, many people choose not to be an employee, they rather would fend for themselves. There are drawbacks to this tendency because this is risky as well as can lead to money mismanagement
Recently,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
prefer to work for themselves
rather
than
being employed
in an enterprise or factory. This essay will discuss the reason why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
might choose to be self-employed, and state the demerits of this latest development.

The reason for this recent trend is that schedules are more flexible when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
earn a living without working for others.
In other words
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
easily
determine their resumption and closing hours without any
Possible spelling mistake found.
consquences
.
That is
, they are able to plan,
Possible spelling mistake found.
resechedule
, and cancel engagements at their personal terms and conditions that suit their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
plans.
For example
, a local bottling
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
in Lagos reported that there was an upsurge in the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that resigned in 2018
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
's rigid work hours.
Thus
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are drifting to the path of personal paying jobs, which
Possible mistake. Please verify.
they self
determines how it runs.

However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
disadvantages to working
independently
.
Firstly
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
is borne
solely
by the individual owner. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
is managed
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
one person who is responsible for all the profits and losses of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
.
Therefore
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
of a one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
is high as all problems associated with the investment
is managed
alone.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
personally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
owned
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
collapsed
as a result
of the rise in inflation rate in 2018.
In addition
, the chances of mismanaging and misappropriating funds becomes more possible
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
an individual is in charge of all financial dealings. This affects the general growth and development of a craft as there will be no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
checks
and balances.

In conclusion
, these days,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
choose not to be an employee, they
rather
would fend for themselves. There are drawbacks to this tendency
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this is risky
as well
as can lead to money
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
mismanagement
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO-38 task 1Your friend is thinking about getting a pet and asks for your advice. What kind of pet would you recommend for your friend? Explain the reasons for your recommendation. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
303 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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