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TPO 29Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? To improve the quality of education, universities should spend more money on salaries for university professors. v.1

TPO 29 To improve the quality of education, universities should spend more money on salaries for university professors. v. 1
One of the decesiving factors in a society' s development is their academic performance particularlly universities. Some people believe that the universities should increase their professors' earning in order to enhance the quality of university' s education level; while others oppose this perspective. In my vantage point of view, paying more money to universities' professors deos not essentially results in improving the quality of university education. In what follows, I will elucidate the most paramount reasons to substanciate my viewpoint. The first and foremost reason which should be mentioned here is that all of the university' s professors do not improve their teaching quality by earning more money. There is no doubt that the education quality not only depends on the lecturers' teaching skills but also rely on students' desire to learn and search. Some professors in high rank universities earn huge mount of money through their industrial activities; so, they do not need university' s money anymore. If they want to improving their training performance and as a result university' s education quality, they could utilize other practical ways such as proivding searching opportunity for elite students. The last but not the least reason which should be pointed out is that the university could enhancing their academic performance by spending more money on research equipments that will lead to producing cut-edge knowledge. To elucidate, the more a university invests on educational and research equipment, the more money they earn from industry. It is unambigious that todays' development raises from academic researches; a majority of developed country asserts that investing in academic progress will lead them to the economic growth in a wide variety of ways. In brief, all the aforementioned reasons lead us to conclude that highering the professors' salary will not necessarily lead to the high quality education in the universities. The first reason is that professors' performance is not the only factor in education quality of a university. Moreovre, universities' education level largely depend on their research labs and equipment.
One of the
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decesiving
factors in a
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society&
#039; s development is their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
Possible spelling mistake found.
particularlly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
should increase their
Possible spelling mistake found.
professors&
#039; earning in order to enhance the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
university&
#039; s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
level; while others oppose this perspective. In my vantage point of view, paying more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to
Possible spelling mistake found.
universities&
#039;
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
Possible spelling mistake found.
deos
not
essentially
results in improving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. In what follows, I will elucidate the most paramount
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
to
Possible spelling mistake found.
substanciate
my viewpoint.

The
first
and foremost
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
which should
be mentioned
here is that
Consider using "all the".
all of the
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university&
#039; s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their teaching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
by earning more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
. There is no doubt that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
depends on the
Possible spelling mistake found.
lecturers&
#039; teaching
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
rely on
Possible spelling mistake found.
students&
#039; desire to learn and search.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
in high rank
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
earn huge mount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
through their industrial activities;
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, they do not need
Possible spelling mistake found.
university&
#039; s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
anymore. If they want to
Did you mean "improve"?
improving
their training
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
and
as a result
Possible spelling mistake found.
university&
#039; s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
, they could utilize other practical ways such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
proivding
searching opportunity for elite students.

The last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not the least
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
which should
be pointed
out is that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
could
The verb 'could' requires the base form of the verb: "enhance"
enhancing
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
by spending more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
equipments that will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to producing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
-edge knowledge. To elucidate, the more a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
invests on educational and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
equipment, the more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
they earn from industry. It is
Possible spelling mistake found.
unambigious
that
Possible spelling mistake found.
todays&
#039; development raises from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
researches
; a majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed country
asserts that investing in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
progress will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
them to the economic growth in a wide variety of ways.

In brief
, all the aforementioned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
us
to conclude
that
Possible spelling mistake found.
highering
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
professors&
#039; salary will not
necessarily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to the high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
. The
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is that
Possible spelling mistake found.
professors&
#039;
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
is not the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
factor in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Moreovre
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
universities&
#039;
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
level
largely
depend on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
labs and equipment.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
61Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
24Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO 29 To improve the quality of education, universities should spend more money on salaries for university professors. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
333 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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