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TPO-29 - Independent Writing TaskDo you agree or disagree with the following statement? To improve the quality of education, universities should spend money on salaries university professors. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.2

TPO-29 - Independent Writing Task To improve the quality of education, universities should spend money on salaries university professors. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 2
Will spending money on salaries of university professors enhance the quality of education? Although some people may give a negative answer on the question, I strongly support it because of the reasons which will be discussed in details below. Firstly, spending money on professors will attract more professionals in universities. Today some tertiary institutions are understaffed because the size of educators’ salaries makes working in the university unattractive for many well-prepared professors; therefore, the quality of education seems to be low. However, if the policy is implemented, many professors will apply for a job. This change will let universities to pick the best educators with lots of experience and expertise; a competition among professors may indeed benefit universities, students via increasing an overall quality of higher education. Secondly, professors who are well-paid will be able to devote more time to their students. Today many professors who are employed by universities rarely teach students because mostly they involved in researches which will attract money to their studies. In other words, they have to keep doing their scientific studies in order to get enough money for a comfortable life. However, if the system of education starts to allocate money on professors' salaries, the educators will learn that they are wanted to share their expertise and knowledge with their listeners because financial stimuli is a good motivator for people and by steering flow of money we may alter professors’ priorities. This step leads to improvement of the quality of education inasmuch as students, who are taught by well-known and famous scientists who made a contribution in their scientific fields, will have access to professors’ knowledge, prospect on subject. Thus we may expect skyrocketing of the quality of tertiary education. Admittedly, there are some reasons which may allow a person who thinks that in order to improve the quality of education universities ought not to spend money of institutions’ staff salaries. Chiefly, the person may aver that buying new equipment for labs, books for libraries and computers is a better way to improve the quality of tertiary education. However, I still affirm that distributing money on professors’ salaries is more reasonable step because even the best lab equipment in the world and most recent textbooks will not magically improve students' performance on their own. In fact, without well-motivated and well-taught professors with lots of expertise those new items will be useless pile of high tech stuff. However, professors who satisfied with their income and who made enough money for having a comfortable life may improve the level of education enormously. To wrap up, professors are valuable asset; this work position must be well-paid in order to attract many of candidates from whom the institution may pick the best ones. Additionally to it, if a professor knows that he is paid for teaching, he will spend more time on teaching as well.
Will spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
enhance the
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quality
of
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education
? Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
may give a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
answer on the question, I
strongly
support it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the reasons which will
be discussed
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
below.

Firstly
, spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
will attract more professionals in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
tertiary institutions
are understaffed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the size of educators’
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
working in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
unattractive for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
well-prepared
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
;
therefore
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
seems to be low.
However
, if the policy
is implemented
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
will apply for a job. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
to pick the best educators with lots of experience and expertise; a competition among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
may
indeed
benefit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
via increasing an
overall
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of higher education.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are well-paid will be able to devote more time to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are employed
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
rarely teach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
mostly
they involved in researches which will attract
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to their studies.
In other words
, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
doing their scientific studies in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for a comfortable life.
However
, if the system of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
to allocate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on
Possible spelling mistake found.
professors&
#039;
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
, the educators will learn that they
are wanted
to share their expertise and knowledge with their listeners
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
financial stimuli is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
motivator for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and by steering flow of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
we may alter
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors’
priorities. This step leads to improvement of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
inasmuch as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are taught
by well-known and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
scientists
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
made a contribution in their scientific fields, will have access to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors’
knowledge, prospect on subject.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
we may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
skyrocketing of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of tertiary education.

Admittedly
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons which may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
a person
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thinks
that in order to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
ought not to spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
of institutions’ staff
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
.
Chiefly
, the person may aver that buying new equipment for labs, books for libraries and computers is a better way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of tertiary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
However
, I
still
affirm that distributing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors’
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
is more reasonable step
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
even the best lab equipment in the world and most recent textbooks will not
magically
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
Possible spelling mistake found.
students&
#039; performance on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
. In fact, without well-motivated and well-taught
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
with lots of expertise those new items will be useless pile of high tech stuff.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
satisfied with their income and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
made
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for having a comfortable life may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
the level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
enormously
.

To wrap up,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
are valuable asset; this work position
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be well-paid in order to attract
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of candidates from whom the institution may pick the best ones.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Additionally
to it, if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professor
knows that he
is paid
for teaching, he will spend more time on teaching
as well
.
19Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
66Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO-29 - Independent Writing Task To improve the quality of education, universities should spend money on salaries university professors. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
477 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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