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TPO 21 - Question 2 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement: Your friends are the most important influence in your life. Use details and examples to explain your opinion. v.1

TPO 21 - Question 2 : Your friends are the most important influence in your life. Use details and examples to explain your opinion. v. 1
After having a hectic schedule, people tend to get away from it all in the summer by going on a holiday. Therefore, the number of tourists often grows rapidly, which has two-sided influences. Government and residents are the one to realize the impact of mass tourism on different nations where visitors have been through. It is true that tourists may affect negated in some cases, but they still have definite advantages. Thanks to the growth of foreign visitors, the level of unemployment goes down, more and more people are now occupied by being a tour guide or an office worker in a tourism service office. Also, it is the base for indigenous residents to exchange the culture from each other which is immensely crucial to the tendency of globalization nowadays. For instance, people likely to learn more languages because they believe that languages will cross the border and get others closer by making events related to those cultures. Both benefits mentioned above promote all help the development of the national economy due to the tourist attractions mushroom and the similarity, ease when catches something originated in their countries. However, mass tourism can take its toll on the local sites and the environment. In order to attract more tourists, pristine areas are now filled with luxury hotels, resorts and tourism service places due to the need for more accommodation. In addition, not only the environment is adversely affected, but also local sites either. Overseas travellers may vandalize the heritage by littering, graffiti and so one which cause the historic buildings severely run-down. As a result, we need to take some methods to halt the level of tourist effects on countries. First, we should put warning signs in front of local sites for bar tourists from touching, coming close or doing harm to statues, historic sites and so on. Second, raising entrance fees for some tourist attractions such as Son Doong Cave, which is now in process of run down, to limit the number of visitors. The last one, we should bring in new tourism laws to restrict the entrance (visa, ID card, papers, . . . ) And consider rough punishment for those who break the laws. In conclusion, it is important for tourists to handle the negative effects that each of them make. And the way to reduce that problem is tourists have to show good attitude wherever they are.
After having a hectic schedule,
people
tend to
get
away from it all in the summer by going on a holiday.
Therefore
, the number of
tourists
often
grows
rapidly
, which has two-sided influences.
Government
and residents are the one to realize the impact of mass
tourism
on
different
nations where visitors have been through.

It is true that
tourists
may affect negated in
some
cases,
but
they
still
have
definite
advantages. Thanks to the growth of foreign visitors, the level of unemployment goes down, more and more
people
are
now
occupied by being a tour guide or an office worker in a
tourism
service office.
Also
, it is the base for indigenous residents to exchange the culture from each other which is
immensely
crucial to the tendency of globalization nowadays.
For instance
,
people
likely to learn more languages
because
they believe that languages will cross the border and
get
others closer by making
events
related to those cultures. Both benefits mentioned above promote all
help
the development of the national economy due to the
tourist
attractions mushroom and the similarity,
ease
when catches something originated in their countries.
However
, mass
tourism
can take its toll on the local
sites
and the environment. In order to attract more
tourists
, pristine areas are
now
filled with luxury hotels, resorts and
tourism
service places due to the need for more accommodation.
In addition
, not
only
the environment is
adversely
affected
,
but
also
local
sites
either. Overseas
travellers
may vandalize the heritage by littering, graffiti and
so
one which cause the historic buildings
severely
run-down.

As a result
, we need to take
some
methods to halt the level of
tourist
effects on countries.
First
, we should put warning signs in front of local
sites
for bar
tourists
from touching, coming close or doing harm to statues, historic
sites
and
so
on. Second, raising entrance fees for
some
tourist
attractions such as Son
Doong
Cave, which is
now
in process of run down, to limit the number of visitors. The last one, we should bring in new
tourism
laws to restrict the entrance (visa, ID card, papers
, .
.
.
)
And consider rough punishment for those who break the laws.

In conclusion
, it is
important
for
tourists
to handle the
negative
effects that each of them
make
. And the way to
reduce
that problem is
tourists
have to
show
good
attitude wherever they are.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO 21 - Question 2 : Your friends are the most important influence in your life. Use details and examples to explain your opinion. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
400 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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