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TPO 17 – Independent: A/D? Most advertisements make products seem much better than they really are. v.2

TPO 17 – Independent: A/D? Most advertisements make products seem much better than they really are. v. 2
Marketing is finding potential customers and increasing the sale of the products by advertising them. In this regard, I firmly believe that most advertisements include some exaggeration about the product to attract more consumers. What follows is the elaboration of my viewpoint. Advertisers use specific methods to introduce their product at any expense. That is to say, advertisers utilize technological equipment to make their product shine in a TV program, a magazine, or any other advertising tools and do not pay any attention to results of the exaggeration. For instance, there is a TV commercial for weight-loss lotion which declares that it affects the extra fat in the body at only an hour and shows two women using it and losing some weight which I am sure it is done by a computer video edit program. My friend got deceived by the program and bought the product but it never happened to her, not to mention her skin' s allergy to the lotion and the rash engendered by the lotion. To mention the positive points for several times is a popular method to introduce a product in public. This means that advertisers never touch on the weak points of an output in a commercial, nevertheless they repeat the pros for many times. A marketing theory indicates that recurring a slogan during a television advertisement has far-reaching influence on the audience, even though it may not be correct. Relating the advantages of a product bigger than what it is and disguising its disadvantages from the purchaser is a way to compete with other brands for the same product. In addition, expressing the negative points never encourages a consumer to buy the product. Therefore, sellers draw their customers' attention to the merits of the output and display it better much than the real product. To put it in a nutshell, marketing is the knowledge of using advertisements to inspire the potential costumer to buy the product and does it by introducing the product much better than what it is indeed. In fact, advanced technological equipment in making visual attractions and new psychological methods of marketing have led the commercials overstate the products' features.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Marketing
is finding potential customers and increasing the sale of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
by advertising them. In this regard, I
firmly
believe that most advertisements include
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
exaggeration about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
to attract more consumers. What follows is the elaboration of my viewpoint.

Advertisers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
specific methods to introduce their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
at any expense.
That is
to say, advertisers utilize technological equipment to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
shine in a TV program, a magazine, or any other advertising tools and do not pay any attention to results of the exaggeration.
For instance
, there is a TV commercial for weight-loss lotion which declares that it affects the extra
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
in the body at
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
an hour and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
two women using it and losing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
weight which I am sure it
is done
by a computer video edit program. My friend
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
deceived by the program and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it never happened to her, not to mention her
Possible spelling mistake found.
skin&
#039; s allergy to the lotion and the rash engendered by the lotion.

To mention the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
points for several times is a popular method to introduce a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
in public. This means that advertisers never touch on the weak points of an output in a commercial,
nevertheless
they repeat the pros for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
times. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketing
theory indicates that recurring a slogan during a television advertisement has far-reaching influence on the audience,
even though
it may not be correct.

Relating the advantages of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
bigger than what it is and disguising its disadvantages from the purchaser is a way to compete with other brands for the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
.
In addition
, expressing the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
points never encourages a consumer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
.
Therefore
, sellers draw their
Possible spelling mistake found.
customers&
#039; attention to the merits of the output and display it better much than the real product.

To put it in a nutshell,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketing
is the knowledge of using advertisements to inspire the potential costumer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
and does it by introducing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
much better than what it is
indeed
. In fact, advanced technological equipment in making visual attractions and new psychological methods of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketing
have led the commercials overstate the
Possible spelling mistake found.
products&
#039; features.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO 17 – Independent: A/D? Most advertisements make products seem much better than they really are. v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
361 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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