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TPO 15 - Question 2Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is important to remember and learn from the past. Use details and examples to explain your opinion. v.1

TPO 15 - Question 2 It is important to remember and learn from the past. Use details and examples to explain your opinion. v. 1
The price of natural foods are significantly higher when compared to mass-produced food. In my opinion, although it may be expensive, I believe that they worth the extra costs, which will be discussed further in the essay below. To start with, organic fruits and vegetables are planted in a separate soil and farm. This allows them to grow in a healthier environment without any chemicals, such as pesticide or wax, that can cause major illnesses to the human's body. According to the 'New York' magazine, natural consumed products often help the digestive system within the body to function quickly, remove the unnecessary bacteria that can harm the stomach. Therefore, eating organic produce can improve the human's body, since it does not contain any chemicals. In addition, unlike conventional, healthy goods generally require extra attention and care to nurture. This is because of the fact that these plants only grow in a certain season and condition. For instance, in the U. S, organic farmers normally protect their plants from dying by using traditional methods that allow the plants to grow with the correct amount sun and fertiliser. Due to this, farmers often are required to stay up late in order to harvest the products. Hence, compared with mass-produced, healthy fruit and vegetables need more time and extra care to be produced. In conclusion, despite the expensive price, natural foods provide better vitamins for the body, as it contains less chemicals and requires additional care and attention to grow. In my opinion, I believe that the healthier foods still worth the price when compared with the inexpensive conventional products.
The price of natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
Did you mean "is"?
are
significantly
higher when compared to mass-produced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. In my opinion, although it may be expensive, I believe that they worth the extra costs, which will
be discussed
further
in the essay below.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, organic fruits and vegetables
are planted
in a separate soil and farm. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grow
in a healthier environment without any chemicals, such as pesticide or wax, that can cause major illnesses to the human's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
. According to the 'New York' magazine, natural consumed products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the digestive system within the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
to function
quickly
, remove the unnecessary bacteria that can harm the stomach.
Therefore
, eating organic produce can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the human's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
, since it does not contain any chemicals.

In addition
, unlike conventional, healthy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
generally
require extra attention and care to nurture. This is
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "because".
because of the fact that
these plants
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grow
in a certain season and condition.
For instance
, in the U. S, organic farmers
normally
protect their plants from dying by using traditional methods that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
the plants to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grow
with the correct amount sun and
Possible spelling mistake. 'fertiliser' is British English.
fertiliser
. Due to this, farmers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
are required
to stay up late in order to harvest the products.
Hence
, compared with mass-produced, healthy fruit and vegetables need more time and extra care to
be produced
.

In conclusion
, despite the expensive price, natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
provide better vitamins for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
, as it contains
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun chemicals is countable.
less
chemicals and requires additional care and attention to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grow
. In my opinion, I believe that the healthier
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
still
worth the price when compared with the inexpensive conventional products.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
With languages, you are at home anywhere.
Edward De Waal

IELTS essay TPO 15 - Question 2 It is important to remember and learn from the past. Use details and examples to explain your opinion. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
267 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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