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town planners should have a preference for more parks and gyms to be created than business districts and shopping malls

town planners should have a preference for more parks and gyms to be created than business districts and shopping malls PryrK
It is widely believed that town planners should have a preference for more parks and gyms to be created than business districts and shopping malls. I completely digagree with the afore mentioned statement and will discuss the same in this essay. On the one hand, there a several reason why people are in favor of develop public park and sport facilities is more love due to the fact it can help not only children also the oldsters have a place to exerise, relax and activities. This is good place for people to socialize with their neighbors. A harmonious relationship between residents helps build a caring and friendly neighborhood. If the town havenot the places, the people only know to stay at home, closeness or communication with people around will be limited. That will make people feel depressed and give birth to lazy communication disease Besides the benefits that parks and amusement parks bring, commercial areas and shopping centers also give town residents many great benefits. The first, economy will be improved, people's living standard will be improved. For example, a shopping mall can provide employment. Locals can find work in retail, maintenance or security of the mall, hence earning an income to support their families. Addtionally, a shopping center could make shopping more convenient for the local residents. It would enable them to easily purchase things in town and transport them home with less effort and at lower cost From what have been discussed above, to brief summary, despite reasonable explanations for benefit for building parks and sports facilities, I hold my position that shopping centers are just as important as parks and gyms in a town.
It is
widely
believed that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
planners should have a preference for more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parks
and gyms to
be created
than business districts and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
malls. I completely
Possible spelling mistake found.
digagree
with the
Possible spelling mistake found.
afore
mentioned statement and will discuss the same in this essay.

On the one hand, there a several reason why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are in favor of develop public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
and sport facilities is more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
due to the fact it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
children
also
the oldsters have a place to
Possible spelling mistake found.
exerise
, relax and activities. This is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
place for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to socialize with their neighbors. A harmonious relationship between residents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
build a caring and friendly neighborhood. If the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
Possible spelling mistake found.
havenot
the places, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
know to stay at home, closeness or communication with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
around will
be limited
. That will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
feel depressed and give birth to lazy communication
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
disease


Besides
the benefits that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parks
and amusement
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parks
bring, commercial areas and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
centers
also
give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
residents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
great benefits. The
first
, economy will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's living standard will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
.
For example
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
mall can provide employment. Locals can find work in retail, maintenance or security of the mall,
hence
earning an income to support their families.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Addtionally
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
center could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
more convenient for the local residents. It would enable them to
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
things in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
and transport them home with less effort and at lower
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
cost


From what have
been discussed
above, to brief summary, despite reasonable explanations for benefit for building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parks
and sports facilities, I hold my position that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
centers are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parks
and gyms in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
.
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IELTS essay town planners should have a preference for more parks and gyms to be created than business districts and shopping malls

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
277 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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