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Tourists visit difficult places. What are the benefits and disadvantages?

Tourists visit difficult places. What are the benefits and disadvantages? e5bXB
Nowadays, tourists who are visiting places where conditions are harsh are increasing ever than before. The reason may be not known much but there are some advantages and disadvantages. This essay illustrates those points. There are clear benefits of people visiting physical sites. Firstly, more precise details about those places can be revealed so that they can be used in academics. Secondly, the skills, knowledge and attitudes of those who visit these places are improved as the expeditions are always challenging. Thirdly, this new interest of tourists will definitely make inroads to a novel tourism industry, which is always associated with economic returns. For instance, occupations such as tourist guides and travel agents will be benefited. However, there are some negative effects that are also associated with this type of tourism. The most prominent one is the danger that these hikes create. As the conditions in these places are worse, there is a high risk of people getting injured, because of falling, dehydration and freezing. On the other hand, these calm and balanced ecosystems can be damaged by the tourism-related activities such as camping, fires and garbage disposal. For instance, some creatures living in these remote areas hate even a little noise. Oftentimes, people do not care about or do not know how much they must be careful in an unfamiliar environment. To conclude, I am convinced that there are pros and cons of people visiting difficult places in the world.
Nowadays, tourists who are visiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
where conditions are harsh are increasing
Use "(ever)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
ever
than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
. The reason may be not known much
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advantages and disadvantages. This essay illustrates those points.

There are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
visiting physical sites.
Firstly
, more precise
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
about those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
can
be revealed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in academics.
Secondly
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, knowledge and attitudes of those who visit these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
as the expeditions are always challenging.
Thirdly
, this new interest of tourists will definitely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
inroads to a novel tourism industry, which is always associated with economic returns.
For instance
, occupations such as tourist guides and travel agents will
be benefited
.

However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects that are
also
associated with this type of tourism. The most prominent one is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
that these hikes create. As the conditions in these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
are worse, there is a high
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
getting injured,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of falling, dehydration and freezing.
On the other hand
, these calm and balanced ecosystems can
be damaged
by the tourism-related activities such as camping, fires and garbage disposal.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
creatures living in these remote areas hate even a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
noise. Oftentimes,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not care about or do not know how much they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be careful in an unfamiliar environment.

To conclude
, I
am convinced
that there are pros and cons of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
visiting difficult
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
in the world.
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IELTS essay Tourists visit difficult places. What are the benefits and disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
241 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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